Save the Past
by F-ckthesystem125
Summary: A new kid has come to High Skool on a mission. That mission? Get Zim and Gaz together, get Dib and Tak together, and keep a mysterious assassin from killing any and all of them. Rated M for Violence, Language, and Lemons (later on). I don't own Invader Zim. Just my OCs.
1. High Skool

The area was nothing more than a barren wasteland covered in darkness. The sky was painted red as horrid vampire piggies circled the sky around a lone figure draped in an ebony cloak, with long purple hair flowing from under a gray tattered hat. It brandished a long glowing blade as it stared at the army of piggies that were raining down to devour their prey, only to be slaughtered when they got within range of the blade. The figure calmly walked the path up to the castle, slicing any piggy that was foolish enough to get too close. They kept on going before they entered the castle, where a massive vampire piggy awaited.

"GAZ!" shouted the piggy as Gaz peeked out from under her hat with a smirk.

"You know me? I'm flattered." she said.

"GAZ!" shrieked the piggy again.

"Are you going to fight, or just speak my name?" Gaz asked.

"GAZ! WAKE UP!" Gaz's eyes shot open as the piggy shouted at her in the voice of her annoying brother before everything faded. Gaz growled as she rose from her bed, her hatred for her brother already reaching maximum levels. "Come on Gaz! You can't be late for skool again!" shouted Dib from the other side of the door.

"I heard you the first time, Dib. Now leave me alone before I make you suffer." Gaz growled. She heard footsteps getting farther away before she arose from her bed. Her room was pitch black thanks to the curtains that blocked out the sun, which was perfect for her as she liked the dark. "Stupid brother making me get up for stupid High Skool." she muttered in anger. She rose from her bed and turned on a nearby lamp before she began to dress herself. She put on some panties and was in the middle of putting on her bra before she froze. "Oh no." she groaned as she found herself struggling to put it on before giving up and pulling out some measuring tape. She wrapped it around herself and measured to find that she had grown...again. She growled before throwing the now too small bra away and reaching for a bigger one she bought in advance. This had been a routine for her since she had hit puberty. Now she was 16 years old and she hated her body. She was a little taller than most girls her age, but not freakishly tall. Her legs were long, slender, and hairless. Her hips and ass were perfectly shaped. Her waist was slim. Her breasts were huge, just a little smaller than her head, and amazingly perky. She only wore a bra because the skool had a problem with her nipples poking through her shirt. Her skin was pale and free of unwanted body hair and blemishes. She had the body that was perfect, and she fucking hated it. All it did was draw unwanted attention from men and petty insults from women. "Stupid genetically altered body." she growled as she got the rest of her clothes and began to dress.

-In the kitchen-

Dib was already dressed and eating some toast in the kitchen while mentally preparing himself to stop Zim from whatever evil scheme the alien had. He had matured as well, his body lean with a bit of muscle from all the years of stopping Zim from destroying Earth. His head, though more proportioned to his body, was still just big enough that others kept on mocking it for it's size. His attire hadn't much changed over the years, save for the biker gloves and combat boots. His hair still had that scythe like style to it, and his obsession with exposing Zim hadn't waned at all.

"Whatever plan you have Zim, I'll be there to stop it!" he said before taking another bite of toast.

"Shut up, Dib!" Gaz growled as she entered the kitchen. She wore a purple tank top with an open black jacket, dark red skirt, black and purple striped stockings, her skull necklace, and steel toed boots. Her hair was still the same way it had been since she was a kid, framed around her head like a mouth. "I don't want to hear about your paranormal crap first thing in the morning."

"Good morning children." said their father, Professor Membrane, from his floating screen.

"Hey dad." they both said in unison as Gaz ate some cereal.

"Have a good day at school child- NO! DON'T MIX THAT!" he yelled before an explosion far off into the city was seen and the screen went blank.

"He hasn't tried anything for the past three days, but I know he'll strike soon." Dib said. "And when I do, I'll expose him for the alien he is!"

"Why don't you try and expose Tak?" Gaz asked, though she didn't really care. "She's been stranded here for the past 4 years."

"I know, but she hates Zim too. So she and I came to an agreement. She helps me expose Zim to the world, and I help her get off our world for good. It's a win-win." Dib explained.

"That, and you still have lingering feelings for her." Gaz said, causing Dib to choke on his toast.

"Don't joke about that!" Dib coughed. "She's an alien, and Zim's species! I don't have feelings for her!"

"Keep telling yourself that, Dib." Gaz said as she finished her cereal and they both walked out the door. Neither of them took the bus unless it rained since the kids didn't want to sit on the same side as Dib, and Gaz didn't want any of them to sit next to her, so both of them walked to skool. Gaz tuned Dib out when he started to go on and on about Zim and other paranormal things as they waited for a light to change on a street corner.

"Hello, Dib-Stink! Little-Gaz!" Both of them turned to see Zim walking towards them from another street. Zim still wore the same wig and contacts, but his Invader uniform had been altered to fit the new height he had acquired and slight muscle tone. It seemed that, though it repulsed him to no end, the food the humans ate had something added that allowed Zim's body to grow, making him just a few inches taller than Dib.

"Zim." both Membranes said. One in hatred, the other in mild annoyance.

"What are you doing here Space Boy?!" Dib demanded.

"Zim is here because this is the route from my house to High Skool." Zim said. "Even the Dib-FILTH should know that by now."

"He's got your there." Gaz said.

"Whose side are you on?" Dib asked, though he couldn't help but agree with Zim that his house was this way. He shook his head before glaring at Zim. "What are you planning?!"

"I plan to get through this day at skool, just like the normal human I am." Zim explained.

"Bull!" Dib yelled.

"What does an Earth beast have to do with me going to skool?" Zim asked in confusion. Dib blinked while Gaz just shook her head before seeing the light has changed.

"Move it you two. The light changed." Gaz said, already halfway across the street. Dib and Zim continued to bicker and yell at each other as they walked to skool, with Dib saying he'd stop Zim and Zim claiming he was normal. 10 minutes of walking later and the Hi Skool was in sight. It was a giant building, surrounded by a high fence with barbed wire all around it. It was just like Elementary Skool, only bigger. In front of the skool building were many kids hanging out and talking before they had to go into they first classes for the day. And leaning against the wall just in front of the entrance of the skool was another Irken in disguise. Tak. She too had grown thanks to having no choice but to eat human food, though she was smart enough to develop a serum that did away with the horrid taste of it. Her hologram showed her as a 16 year old version of her previous disguise from seven years ago. Her blue hair was longer and covered her left eye, giving her a mysterious look. She also wore a stud nose piercing on her left nostril. Her clothing was practically the same as before since the humans were oblivious to whether she changed her look or not. Her figure was another story, as it wasn't a part that she put into her hologram. She had explained to Dib that her an Irken's body adapts when they spend a certain amount of time on another planet to help blend in with the local species, which explained why she now sported a bust size half of Gaz's size and nice hips.

"Ah, good to see you three again." she spat when they came close to the entrance.

"Not now." Gaz said, clearly at the end of her patience for annoying people.

"What's wrong? These two annoying you once again?" Tak asked, knowing that she was pressing the right buttons to rile Gaz. Gaz's hands were clenching into fists as the bell rang, signalling that skool was about to start. The kids all flocked inside, leaving the area outside of the skool free of kids. All except for one.

"So," said a young man with a big grin on his face. "This is the place my parents went to when they attended High Skool. Can't wait to meet them!"

A/N: I hope you all enjoyed the first chapter. Please tell me what you thought.


	2. Meet Derrick

Gaz scowled as she walked through the halls. She hadn't taken three steps inside before people began to ogle her. Dib was irritated as well, but that was only because he was an overprotective brother. Tak had studied about human interaction and couldn't help but smirk at Gaz's annoyance. Zim was still pretty clueless, which is why he had no idea why human males found giant sacks of meat hanging on Earth female chests attractive.

"Still as popular as ever." Tak said with a smirk.

"Keep talking and I'll tear your Pak off." Gaz snapped.

"Look. The freaks are having a spat!" The children all laughed as the four of them glared at a blonde girl that had spoken.

"Jessica." Gaz spat, clearly not wanting to talk to the Skool's most popular bitch. That was not going to happen soon since Jessica and her friends were standing right in front of it. "Move it. I'm not in the mood to deal with you today."

"What's the matter? Have enough trouble dealing with your weird brother and weird friends?" said one of the girls.

"Zim is no friend to anyone!" Zim suddenly stated. "Out of my way Dirt Woman!"

"Ouch." Jessica said in mock hurt before turning to Gaz. "Here that Gaz? Even the green kid can't stand to be around a freak like you."

"Can we please get through?" Dib asked as he stepped forward, causing the other kids to take two steps back.

"Watch out. Dib might squish us with his big head!" said another girl, causing another uproar of laughter around them.

"It's not that big!" Dib yelled. The kids were ready to argue before the bell rang again. "Oh great! Late again!"

"Well, my work here is done." Jessica said with a grin before the kids began to disperse to their classes. Gaz, Dib, Tak, and Zim all split as well to attend their own classes, already dreading this day.

-Gaz-

Gaz entered her first class, which was advanced Trigonometry, and sat down in her seat before a shadow fell over her. She didn't need to look up to know it was her teacher, a giant, fat man wearing a suit that was a size too small, and a bit of drool down his lip.

"MmmummmLate." mumbled the teacher in a deep voice.

"Shit happens." Gaz said without looking at him. The teacher only grunted before handing her a detention slip and walking to the board. Gaz shoved the paper into her pocket as the teacher began the lesson before the phone rang on his desk. Everyone looked as the teacher answered the phone.

"Mmmmmm. Mmmm? Mmmmokay." said the teacher before hanging up the phone. "Mmmrrrrclass. Mmmmumuaaaaa new student." The kids all looked at each other and began to whisper about what the new kid would be like before the teacher open the door. "Mmmmm new student?"

"I don't know? Am I?!" Everyone looked to see a young man of 17 standing in the doorway. They watched him walk in and stand in front of the class, letting them all get a good look at him. He was around 6' 4" with long purple hair that went down to the middle of his back, with long bangs hanging in front of his blue eyes. He wore a purple purple top with an equally purple sweatband on his left wrist, none of which hid the lean muscle he had on him. He wore black baggy jeans that were held up with an orange belt with a skull buckle, and white running shoes. "Hello!" he shouted to everyone with a big grin before his eyes started darting around the room. The kids were whispering again as the teacher walked back to his desk and turned to the new kid.

"Mmmmm name?" asked the teacher.

"Name's Derrick. But everyone calls me Dim!" said the kid.

"Mmmmhmmm Dim. Mmmmm Introductions. Ehhmmmmm bathroom." said the teacher before leaving the room, letting the others and Dim meet.

"He left." said Derrick before looking at everyone. Everyone was staring at him as he stared back, a small smile on his face. "AH!" he suddenly shrieked, making everyone but Gaz jump. "Jumpy today, aren't we?" he asked while laughing before moving to an empty desk, which was right next to Gaz, making the kids all gasp. The other kids had made it a point that the seats around her should stay vacant, so as to live to see another day. Gaz slowly turned her head and opened one eye at him while a few other kids found their voices.

"Hey! New kid! Don't sit there!"

"Why?" Dim asked.

"Because the girl next to you is Gaz Membrane!" Derrick looked at Gaz and stared for a moment before turning back to the kid.

"So?" he asked.

"Just move to another seat before she kills you!" Derrick just stared at them all before smiling and planting his feet up on his desk.

"Mmmmnope. I like it here." Derrick said as he placed his hands behind his head. The kids were now beginning to sweat and pray that Gaz didn't murder any of them while Gaz glared at Derrick, who looked back and held his hand out to her. "Dim!" Gaz only looked at his hand before turning back to the board.

"Gaz." she said in a disinterested tone. Derrick only shrugged as the teacher came back in and began the lesson.

"Mmmmm Test!" said the teacher as he began handing out slips of paper to the kids. The kids groaned as the teacher went back to his desk and let them work. The kids all worked the little brain cells in their heads until 10 minutes before class ended. "Mmmmm pencil's down." said the teacher before he went around and collected the tests.

"That test hurt my brain." groaned a kid as he rubbed his head.

"I think mine exploded." whimpered another.

"Hey new kid. How'd you-" another said before stopping when he saw Derrick licking his desk.

"My desk tastes funny!" he laughed, making the other kids stare in confusion or worry.

"What is wrong with you?" asked the kid sitting behind him.

"What?" Derrick asked as if he was doing nothing wrong.

"Hey." Everyone stopped when Gaz spoke, making them all turn to her. "If you're gonna act like that, then find a new seat tomorrow."

"What? You gonna make me?" Derrick challenged. The kids all felt the room grow cold as Gaz glared at Derrick, who wasn't at all bothered by it. Gaz growled and was moments from attacking him before the bell rang. Everyone gathered their things and left the room, with Gaz following Derrick with her eyes as he ran walked down the hall. She didn't know this kid, and she didn't care. All she knew was that she was going to destroy him.

-Zim and Dib-

Zim was entering his second class, Science, before a paper ball was thrown at his head, courtesy of Dib.

"You dare hit Zim with this projectile?!" Zim yelled before the teacher, and thin old man with a big smile on his face, held his hands up.

"Now now you two. Today's class activity does not involve spastic violence." he said. Dib and Zim glared at each other as Zim took his seat as while the other children began to walk in. "Now then class, today we-" he stopped when the phone on his desk rang. "Hello? Oh good. Alright." he said before hanging up the phone. "Class, we'll be getting a new student today. He'll be here-"

KNOCK KNOCK

"Oh! Right now." said the teacher as he answered the door. "You must be the new student! Come in!" The kids all saw Derrick walk in with a grin on his face as he looked back at them all.

"Oooh, he's cute." whispered one of the girls in class.

'Ah. Another pathetic human.' Zim thought.

'I wonder if he's interested in the paranormal?' Dib thought.

"Please state your name young man." said the teacher.

"I'm Derrick, but everyone calls me Dim." said Derrick.

"Well then Derrick. The class is pretty full, but I do see an open seat next to Dib Membrane." said the teacher.

"Okay." Derrick said before walking over and sitting next to Dib.

"Everyone, I'll give you some time to talk to our new student while I get the lesson in order." said the teacher.

"Hey, new kid." Dib whispered to Derrick. Derrick turned to Dib while Dib glared at Zim. "See the kid over there with the green skin? That's Zim! He's an alien!"

"Alien?" Derrick asked as he looked at Zim.

"Don't listen to him." said one of the other students. "Dib's crazy."

"Yeah. He goes on and on about ghosts, bigfoot, and other kinds of paranormal stuff." said a girl.

"Besides, Zim's not an alien. He's just got a skin condition." finished another boy.

"Is that why he's green? I thought he was just sick." Derrick laughed.

"Zim is not sick!" Zim shouted. "Zim is a perfectly, healthy, normal human worm baby."

"Word of advice," said another girl. "Try to avoid those two in the future."

"Alright students," interrupted the teacher. "Today's science experiment is a group project, so everyone divide into groups of threes." The students all began to form little groups, leaving Zim, Dib, and Derrick without anyone. "Well, seeing as you three have no group, you all can become one."

"I'm not working with an alien!"

"I refuse to work with this big headed Dib-Stink!"

"My head is not big, you alien!"

"I'M NORMAL!" Both boys kept arguing while Derrick just turned his head from one to the other.

"It's either form a group, or get an F." stated the teacher. "Your choice." Both of them growled before they found themselves in a headlock.

"Don't worry," Derrick said with a grin while Zim and Dib struggled to breathe. "We'll form a group." The teacher nodded and turned before Derrick released the both of them, letting them cough as they tried to breathe. "Let's all get along. At least until the assignment is over." The other two just glared at each other while the rest of the children stared at the group of three, shocked that someone could actually stand to be around those two and smile.

"Now then class. Let's begin the experiment."

-45 minutes later-

Children were coughing and gagging as the smoke from inside the room began to clear up. The teacher struggled to stand up after being knocked back by a blast.

"Well *cough* class," the teacher wheezed. "Let this be a lesson to everyone what happens when you _don't_ follow the instructions to the letter. And I hope you three learned a valuable lesson!" he finished while staring at three forms slowly peeling off a giant black blotch on the wall.

"Not my fault." Dib wheezed as he, Zim, and Derrick slid down the wall.

"Zim is not the cause of this." Zim groaned.

"Oopsie!" Derrick laughed as he shook the black off of him. "Guess that was the wrong mixture."

"That was more than an 'Oopsie'! You practically threw everything together into one beaker!" Dib yelled.

"You two were bickering and nothing was getting done." Derrick said. "We were falling behind."

"Zim knew that the mixture would result that way!" Zim yelled.

"It doesn't matter. The three of you get an F for this little mock up!" said the teacher before the bell rang. "Now, off to your next class!"

-Tak-

Tak had gone through her first two classes like she did every class of every day. Did her work in the first five minutes, then did whatever she wanted the rest of the classes. She sometimes daydreamed of returning home and proving her worth as an Invader to her people and taking Zim's mission. She was now walking to her next class, weaving her way through other students passing by in the halls. While she walked, she listened to the other students, and practically everyone was conversing about the same subject.

"Did you hear about that new kid?"

"I heard that he's supposed to be really cute."

"He's kinda weird."

"I heard he licked his desk in first period."

"I saw it myself. He was standing up to Gaz Membrane!" Tak stopped when those words made their way to her and listened more carefully.

"I saw that too! I also heard that he was willing to work with Dib and Zim!"

"Those two freaks?! That kid ain't right in the head if he can stand being around those two weirdos!"

"Yeah. And I heard those threw blew up their experiment in Science Class."

"HA! Idiots!"

Tak had heard enough and walked on to her next class. She had wanted to meet this new guy that can fearlessly stand up to Gaz _and_ tolerate being around Zim and Dib. She walked in and sat at her desk as her teacher, a middle aged sour woman with her brown and gray hair in a bun, was writing today's history lesson. She stopped writing when the phone started ringing on her desk before she answered it, got angry that she had to teach another kid before slamming the phone.

"Alright class. Against my wishes, we'll be having a new student." scowled the teacher.

'You've got to be kidding me.' Tak thought as the kids began to whisper before a knock was heard at the door. Everyone turned to see the teacher let Derrick into the class. 'This is the new kid, huh?'

"State your name." said the teacher.

"Dim!"

"I asked for your name, not how stupid you are." growled the teacher.

"Name's Derrick, but everyone call's me Dim." Derrick said.

"Whatever. Sit down so we can begin the lesson." barked the teacher. Derrick only grinned before sitting in an empty seat. "Alright! Open your textbooks to chapter 23 and answer the questions on the board! And no talking!" The kids all did their work silently, with Tak finishing hers quickly and closing her eyes while placing her head in her hand. "Miss Tak! No sleeping!"

"I was just rest-"

"No talking either!" snapped the teacher.

'Bitch!' Tak thought while she glared at the teacher before she sat up straight and stared ahead of her. She made a mental note to personally destroy this wretched human in the future when she came back to properly invade this planet. Five minutes had passed and Tak began to look at her classmates. Each of them was just stupid before stopping at Derrick, who was quietly flipping through his book before he looked up and saw her looking at him. They stared at each other for a few moments before he slammed the book down and stood up in his seat.

"STOP LOOKING AT ME!" he screeched before giving off an insane laugh. The kids all just stared at him before their teacher got out of her chair.

"Young man!" yelled the teacher before she walked right up to his desk. "Is there a reason that you're howling like that?"

"I don't know. Is there a reason you have a stick up your ass?" he asked. The kids all gasped in shock while the teacher looked ready to blow.

"See me after class." she ordered through gritted teeth.

"It's a date." Derrick said with a big grin while the teacher just shook before stomping back to her seat.

'This guy's got balls.' Tak thought with a smirk before turning away. The class went on before the bell rang, telling the kids to gather their crap and move on to the next class. Tak left the class but stayed to listen in on the teacher getting ready to yell at Derrick.

"Who do you think you are?!" she yelled.

"I'm Dim." Derrick answered.

"Well, I hope you enjoyed your little stunt, because it's earned you two weeks of detention!" she yelled as she wrote him a slip. Derrick's only response was a smile before he devoured the slip of paper.

"I don't do detention! Bye-Bye!" he said in a cheery voice while waving as he walked out the classroom door, leaving a stunned teacher staring slack-jawwed at him. Tak smirked while she listened in on their conversation before walking off towards the cafeteria.


	3. Lunch

A/N: Short, but I hope you like it.

* * *

Zim, Gaz, Dib, and Tak were all walking from different parts of the school towards the lunchroom, each one thinking about their encounters with Derrick. Gaz was still pissed off by Derrick's desk licking and lack of being intimidated by her this morning. Tak was grinning at how Derrick brushed off their history teacher. And Dib and Zim were irritated that they were blown up by Derrick's insane move of mixing too many chemicals at once in Science. Dib turned a corner and saw his sister's back before running towards her.

"Hey Gaz." he said as he started walking next to her. She glared at him with her eyes slightly open, making him flinch.

"Now's not a good time to talk to me." she growled before sniffing the air. "Why do you smell like tar?"

"Oh. The new kid." Dib said in irritation. "He, Zim, and I had to be partners in Science class. Nearly blasted us to pieces. Why are you angry at him?"

"I have to sit next to him." she said. "He licks his desk." Dib gave her an 'are you for real?' stare as they kept walking through the hallway.

"So, you're going to doom him?" he asked.

"Yes. And soon." she said as they walked into the lunchroom. It was packed with freshmen to seniors either eating, talking, or whatever on many of the tables set inside. Just the way Gaz hated it. The two of them walked in line and got their lunches before sitting at the table with the fewest kids, which happened to be inhabited by Zim and Tak at each end. None of the other kids wanted Zim to sit near them, and none of them could get near Tak without her either hurting them or forgetting where they were due to her mental implant.

"Hello Dib. Gaz." Tak greeted when they sat next to her. "And how has your day been today?" Gaz didn't respond while Dib glared at Zim. "Dib?"

"Huh?" Oh, sorry." Dib said as he looked at her. "It was the same as usual."

"Not from what I heard." Tak said with a smile. "I heard that you two each had a little run in with our new student." Gaz growled while Dib looked at his food.

"Yeah. Derrick, or Dim, or whatever he calls himself." Dib said as he ate some of his food. "Freaking idiot nearly killed me and Zim."

'If only,' Tak thought as she eyed Zim for a moment before looking at Gaz. "And I heard that he's not afraid of you."

"He's new. He'll learn." Gaz said as she took a bite of her pizza slice.

"Did you meet him?" Dib suddenly asked Tak.

"Not personally, but he has third period with me." Tak said. "I've learned two things about him. One: I don't think he likes being stared at."

"Two?" Dib asked.

"He likes eating detention slips." Tak finished.

"That's...weird." was all Dib could think to say.

"Enough!" Gaz snapped. "I already have to spend first period in the same room as that guy! I don't need to hear about him everywhere else!"

"Did you see that new kid?" a passing girl asked another girl.

"I did! He's so sexy!" giggled the other girl. Gaz's hands clenched before she pulled out her Game Slave 4, hoping her videogame would drown out any other words about Derrick. Sadly, she was proven wrong.

"Hey, mind if I sit here?" The three of them turned to see Derrick standing next to them, a tray of food in his hands.

"You again?" Dib asked in disbelief.

"Hey, it's my lab partner!" Derrick said with a smile before turning to Gaz. "And your the girl that likes to sit all alone in class." Then to Tak. "And you like to stare."

"And you like to eat detention slips, lick desks, and blow shit up." Tak said.

"Guilty!" Derrick laughed before looking at Zim. "Why's your friend sitting all alone?"

"Zim is _not_ our friend!" Dib spat.

"Are you speaking for the whole group?" Derrick asked.

"He's an alien! He's here to destroy us all!" Dib yelled.

"I heard this before in Science." Derrick said. "Can I sit down or not?"

"I don't really care." Tak said with a shrug.

"Good enough for me." Derrick said as he sat down next to them. When he did, they got a good look at his tray.

"Is that the mystery meat?" Dib asked as Derrick poked the grey glob of food on his tray with his spork.

"Yep." Derrick said.

"You're actually going to eat that?" Tak asked.

"Nah. I had a big breakfast. I only got it because some of the other kids said that it moves sometimes." Derrick explained as he turned to Gaz. "Not very talkative, are we?"

"I'm in the middle of my game here, so be quiet." Gaz growled. Derrick smiled before he felt something tugging at his hand. He looked down to see his spork being pulled into his meal. He, Dib, and Tak watched as the spork slowly disappeared into the mystery meat before burping.

"It ate my spork!" Derrick said in disbelief before it jumped on his face. "It likes me. OW! It bit me!" he yelled before pulling it off and throwing it into the air. He rubbed his face as Zim began to howl as steam rose off his head.

"THE MEAT IS ATTACKING ME!" he yelled as he began running around in pain, causing Dib and other kids to laugh. Zim finally got the burning meat off of himself before glaring at Dib. "YOU DARE THROW MEAT AT THE MIGHTY ZIM?!" he yelled while holding the glob in his hand.

"I didn't do anything Zim!" Dib protested. "It was the new kid!"

"Don't pawn blame off on me just because I'm new here!" Derrick said.

"What?! But I just saw you throw your food at him!"

"My lunch is right here in front of me." Dib looked down to see that his lunch tray was now in front of Derrick, while Derrick's empty tray now lay before him. His jaw dropped as Gaz opened one eye to see that Derrick had swapped their trays while Dib was laughing.

'Hmm, not bad. Still gonna destory him later.' she thought.

"FILTHY DIB-MONKEY!" Zim yelled as he threw the food at Dib, hitting him right in the eye.

"OH, YOU ROTTEN ALIEN!" he yelled before he grabbed his own tray and threw it at Zim, who ducked to avoid it.

"HA! YOU MISSED!" Zim yelled in triumph before grabbing another student's tray and throwing it at Dib, only to miss and hit a few other students. Dib retaliated and threw some more food at Zim, hitting more students. This kept up before Derrick grinned, ready to give the last push.

"FOOD FIGHT!" Derrick yelled. The cafeteria then erupted into chaos as food began to fly everywhere, hitting everyone and everything in the lunchroom. Dib and Zim were each other's main targets while everyone else just randomly threw food everywhere. Gaz and Tak, being the smarter ones, hid under the table to avoid being hit with anything.

 **"THAT! IS! ENOOOOOUGH!"** Everyone in the room stopped as they stared at the hulking mass of human that stood in the doorway.

"Oh crap!"

"It's the Principal!"

 **"What's going on here?!"** yelled the Principal as his eyes scanned the room.

"THEY STARTED IT!" practically everyone yelled as they pointed at Zim and Dib.

"Zim is not the culprit! The Dib-Worm started it!" Zim yelled as he frantically pointed at Dib.

"No I didn't! It was the new kid!" Dib yelled as he pointed at...nothing. Derrick wasn't anywhere to be seen. "Wha?"

 **"Both of you! IN MY OFFICE!"** yelled the Principal before turning to Gaz and Tak. **"You two as well!"** Gaz and Tak stared in shock that they were called as well before they scowled and followed Dib and Zim outside towards the Principal's office. While they walked, they saw Derrick leaning against the wall, completely clean, with a smirk on his face as he waved his hand goodbye. The anger could almost be felt off of each of them as they all shared the same thought.

'He. Will. PAY!'


	4. DODGEBALL!

Zim, Gaz, Dib, and Tak were all sitting inside the Principal's office, said Principal sitting in his chair before them with his fingers held together and his eyes closed. After a few moments of silence, he opened his eyes to glare at them all.

"Now, from the beginning, what happened?" he asked in a calmer voice. That immediately faded when Zim and Dib began to shout at the same time. **"ONE AT A TIME!"** boomed his voice inside the tiny office, silencing both boys. He took a deep breath before exhaling to calm himself, then looked at Zim. "Zim. You start. And you stay quiet!" he immediately finished when Dib opened his mouth to protest.

"Gladly." Zim said with a smile. "I was merely eating my normal lunch like I do everyday before the dirt child Dib here decided to throw meat at my MIGHTY head!"

"I told you-" Dib started before the Principal glared at him, silently telling him to wait until he was addressed to speak.

"After which," Zim continued. "I simply wished to return his lunch in the same way he gave it to me."

"So you admit that you threw it at him." the Principal summed up before turning to Dib. "And you. Why exactly did you throw it in the first place?"

"I'm telling you, I didn't do it!" Dib stated. "It was the new kid."

"The new student that I hear likes to lick desks, blow up experiments, and backsass teachers?" asked the Principal.

"That's him." all four of them said in unison. The Principal hummed for a moment before hitting a button on his desk while adjusting a microphone and clearing his throat.

"Attention students! Attention!" he spoke over the P.A. system. "This is the Principal speaking! I want our newest student, Dim, report to my office immediately! That is all!" He then clicked another button to switch off the device and looked at the other four. "I believe we'll need to hear his side of the story to understand everything in full." They all waited for a minute or so before a female voice came over the intercom.

"Principal Orum. Dim is here."

"Send him in." said the Principal. Shortly after, Derrick walked in with a big grin on his face.

"Hello!" he said while waving at everyone.

"Have a seat." said Orum as he gestured him to an empty seat. Derrick grinned and sat down lotus style on the seat.

"Hello again." Derrick said as he looked to the others, who angrily glared back at him.

"I've called you here in regards to the food fight earlier." said Orum.

"I know exactly what happened." Derrick said as he reached under his sweat band.

"Pray tell. What happened?" Orum asked.

"No point in telling you," Derrick said before he pulled out a small circular disc from his sweat band and flung it at the Principal. The disc stuck to Orum's forehead for a moment before his body began to spaz, then fall asleep on his desk. "Seeing as you won't remember the last thirty minutes." Derrick then proceeded to take the disc from the Principal's head and place it back under his sweat band.

"What the- What'd you just do?!" Dib asked as he and the other three stared in shock. Derrick only grinned before walking to the door.

"If I were you, I'd be gone by the time he wakes up." was all he said before leaving the room. The others just stared at the door, then at their sleeping Principal.

"Well, I'm leaving." Gaz simply said before standing up and leaving. She was shortly joined by the other three as they left the office and went to their next class. One which they all had the discomfort of sharing. Physical Education.

-Moments later-

Gaz and Tak walked out of the Girl's Locker Room and into the Gymnasium before joining their group wearing gym uniforms of white shirts and black shorts. Tak's uniform fit perfectly, while Gaz's was snug on her body, earning glances from the boys around her. She shot a glare at them to get them to stop before waiting with her group, which was just of her, Tak, Zim, and Dib.

"Care to explain why you're upset?" Tak asked Zim and Dib when she noticed their scowls.

"Wait for it." Dib said as he stared at the door they came in. A moment passed before another teen walked in, dressed in a gym uniform.

"Are you serious?" Gaz asked in disbelief when she saw Derrick walk towards them.

"Hello again." Derrick said with a smile while they glared at him.

"ALRIGHT MAGGOTS!" shouted their gym teacher, a beefy middle-aged ex-Army man with his eyes covered by a blue hat. "TODAY'S ACTIVITY TO TRAIN YOUR SOFT, SQUISHY BODIES IS A PERSONAL FAVORITE OF MINE!" He grinned as he held up a red ball to his face. "DODGEBALL!"

"Oh no." one of the kids squeeked before they all looked at Gaz. They all began praying that they would be on the same team as her. Or at least that she was in a good mood today.

"SPLIT INTO TWO TEAMS!" yelled the teacher before looking up at Derrick. "NEW KID! STEP FORWARD!"

"Okay." Derrick said before stepping forward with a grin.

"HOPE YOU'RE NOT TOO FOND OF THAT GRIN OF YOURS, BECAUSE IT'S ABOUT TO BE WIPED OFF YOUR FACE!" yelled the teacher. "IN MY CLASS, SMILING MEANS THAT YOU'RE HAPPY! AND THAT MEANS YOU'RE NOT MISERABLE! AND THAT MEANS YOU'RE NOT EXERCISING HARD ENOUGH! SO HERE'S WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO! NEW KID HERE IS TEAM A! ALL YOU OTHER MAGGOTS ARE TEAM B!" Smirks and dark chuckles came from the other 37 kids, all of them ready to bean the unlucky new kid. None more so than the four that he had met moments ago. "REMEMBER THE RULES! IF YOU ARE HIT BY THE BALL, YOU ARE OUT! IF YOU CATCH A BALL, THE THROWER IS OUT! IF THE BALL IS KNOCKED OUT OF YOUR HAND VIA ANOTHER BALL, YOU ARE OUT! NOW ALL OF YOU GET TO YOUR DESIGNATED SPOT SO WE CAN BEGIN!" Derrick went to one side while everyone else moved to the other side. Resting on the line was two dozen red dodgeballs for today's game. Everyone waited calmly for the teacher to start the game as the man stepped off to the side and brought his whistle to his lips.

FWEEEEEEEE!

The kids all took off to grab a ball before rushing back away from the line, while Derrick merely stood still and watched with a smirk.

"This is gonna be fun." Tak muttered under her breath with a grin as she and most of the kids began to throw their dodgeballs at Derrick. Derrick's grin never faltered as he began to dance, jump, flip, dive, and weave around each shot, his body flexing around like a giant bendy straw.

"Is he dodging or dancing?"

"Dang! I can't hit him!"

"Stop moving around and let us hit you!" Derrick stuck his tongue out before slapping his ass at them, taunting them all.

"Haha! Can't hit me!" he yelled.

"FEEL THE WRATH OF ZIM!" Zim shouted as he put everything into it and threw his ball at Derrick. Everyone watched as the ball sped toward him with a grin as Derrick stood there. The ball was about an inch from his face...then missed. The kids had no idea what happened, but they weren't as confused as the ones who saw exactly what happend. Gaz, Zim, Tak, and Dib saw Derrick tilt his head at the last second to avoid the ball before moving it back, letting the ball smack into the wall behind him. "YOU DARE DODGE?!"

"It's Dodgeball." said Derrick in a calm voice as he picked up one of the balls. "I guess it's my turn now?"

"HA!" laughed one of the kids. "Good luck hitti-"

SMACK!

Everything looked almost in slow motion as the ball slammed into the kid's face. The poor kid's face twisted and bent funny as his feet slowly left the ground. The kid's body soared to the back wall, where it smacked head first into the wall so hard, it left an imprint of his body on it. The kid fell to the ground and just laid there, teeth broken, blood dripping from his nose, and his eyes twitching.

"...ow." he quietly moaned from where he lay. The other kids slowly looked back to Derrick, who was now tossing another ball up and down in one hand, and dangerous glint in his narrowed eyes.

"So," he said as he held the ball up. "Who's next?" Nobody said anything after a few moments, so Derrick shrugged and turned away from them all. "How about we just let fate decide?" he asked before chucking the ball over his shoulder. A cry of pain told him that he had hit someone before turning to see a girl holding her sides and lying on the floor in pain. "Anybody else?" he asked before looking around. "No? Alright then! START DODGING!" And with that, he began to pick up and throw the dodgeballs with amazing speed and accuracy, dwindling the other teams numbers down to four familiar faces. "Sheesh!" he exclaimed as he looked at the other side. Nearly everyone was either knocked out or groaning in pain. "It's called Dodgeball, yet none of you can dodge?"

"Hey! We're still here!" Dib shouted.

"I'm amazed I missed you." Derrick chuckled. "What with that big head of yours." Despite the pain, the other kids couldn't help but chuckle as well.

"It's not big!" Dib shouted in protest before throwing the ball, only for Derrick to jump, flip, grab the ball in mid-air, and throw it back at Dib, where it smacked his glasses right off his face.

"Many down, three to go!" Derrick said while the others looked at Dib. Gaz's expression was stony while Zim laughed his head off. Tak however was furious. She gripped the ball so tightly that it nearly burst in her hands before whipping her head around towards Derrick. A growl escaped her throat before she flung the ball at him. Her scowl deepened when Derrick caught the ball, which took her out of the game. Now it was Dim Vs. Zim and Gaz. "You ready to admit defeat?"

"NEVER!" Zim yelled dramatically. "ZIM WILL NEVER ADMIT DEFEAT TO THE LIKES OF-" *BAM* -a ztupid new kid like yous!" Zim finished before falling onto his face, a dodgeball landing next to him.

"You okay?" Derrick asked as Zim shook his head and got up.

"I can still fight! Bring me a dodgeball!" Zim yelled.

"ZIM! YOU HAVE BEEN TAKEN OUT OF THE GAME! GET OFF TO THE SIDES NOW!" yelled the Gym Teacher. Zim looked at the teacher with anger in his eyes before marching off to the sidelines with the rest of the class, leaving Gaz by herself on the field.

"You've haven't touched a single dodgeball since the game started." Derrick pointed out. "Don't want to play or something?"

"No." Gaz said before reaching down and picking up a dodgeball, a small smile on her lips. "I just wanted to take you our personally."

"Oh, this is gonna be good." one of the kids said as the all waited to see Gaz legally hurt Derrick. Zim, Tak, and Dib all watched with grins as Gaz threw the ball at a blinding speed, catching Derrick off guard. He barely had time to avoid the ball as he ducked, letting the ball whiz just above his head and smack into the wall so hard that it not only burst, it managed to leave a massive crack in the wall.

"Yikes." Derrick muttered before he turned to see Gaz throw another one. "AH!" he yelled as he jumped away, leaving the ball to suffer the same fate as the last one.

"MEMBRANE! I ADMIRE THE NEED TO EXERT PHYSICAL PROWESS, BUT THAT'S SCHOOL PROPERTY! PULL BACK BEFORE YOU DESTROY ANY MORE DODGEBALLS OR THE WHOLE WALL!" yelled the teacher.

"Hmph. Guess you get to live." Gaz grumbled before she threw another ball.

"You wouldn't be the first one who wanted me dead, and you won't be the last." Derrick declared before he picked up another ball and launched it at her. She dodged before launching another ball herself. The whole gymansium shortly became a battlefield after that, with Derrick and Gaz launching dogdeball after dodgeball at each other. The other kids in class had to keep dodging once again despite already being taken out earlier as their battle went out of control. Neither combatant gained or lost an inch as they kept throwing and dodging dodgeballs.

"Okay. I'm impressed." Tak said as she watched them.

"This Derrick person appears to be a worthy opponent if he can keep up with Little Gaz." Zim added. "Especially since they've been at this for most of the class period."

"He's only alive because she's actually having fun." Dib said, having seen the faint smile creep to her lips. It was true. Gaz was actually having fun fighting against Derrick, even if it was a dumb game like dodgeball. "She'll get serious in a moment."

"Hmm." Tak hummed before she noticed the behavior of some of the other kids. They were either smiling or grinning, a tint of red on each of their cheeks. She followed their line of sight before she rolled her eyes. They were staring at Gaz, mostly her sweat soaked shirt , as she jumped and dodged around during the game. "Pfft. Perverts."

"What?" Dib asked before looking at what she was looking at. First the men, then at his sister. His eyes widened, then narrowed in rage before glaring at them. "Hey! Stop staring at my sister!"

"Shut up!" one of them barked.

"Yeah! Mind your own business!"

"No one else in this school, or this city, has a rack like hers!" Dib grit his teeth after that remark as he glared at them, wanting nothing more than to break their teeth.

'Rack?' Zim thought as he stared at Gaz. 'I see nothing of the sort on her.'

"Leave them alone," Tak said at once. "Besides, staring from this far is all they can hope to achieve. Anything more is completely out of their reach." Now it was their turn to grit their teeth in anger while she smirked at them.

"Are you saying we have no chance with her?!" one of them growled.

"Pfft. Anyone with eyes can tell you have no chance with _any_ woman." Tak scoffed.

"Why you little-"

FWEEEEEEEEE!

"ALRIGHT! TIME IS UP!" yelled the teacher, stopping the teen from finishing his sentence. Everyone turned to see Gaz and Derrick ready to throw another dodgeball each before the teacher stepped between them. "SEEING AS THIS IS STILL THE FIRST ROUND, AND THAT NEITHER SIDE'S TEAM HAS LOST ALL IT'S PLAYERS, I HEREBY DECLARE IT...A DRAW!" He then turned to both Gaz and Derrick. "EXCELLENT JOB IN KEEPING FIT! BOTH OF YOU GET AN A! NOW EVERYONE! GATHER YOUR PUDGY SELVES UP, GET CLEANED UP, AND GET READY FOR THE REST OF YOUR DAYS! CLASS...DISMISSED!" The kids quietly groaned as they left for their respective locker rooms, washed the sweat and blood off in the showers, dried off, then changed to head for their next classes. Gaz was a good 20 ft. from the locker room door before Derrick walked up next to her.

"Hey," he greeted. "That was pretty intense."

"Hmm." was all she responded with while opening one eye at him.

"Rematch sometime?" he asked. That actually got Gaz to smile.

"You have a deathwish or something?" she asked.

"Nah. I just haven't been able to find someone outside my family that can put up a decent fight in anything." he said.

"Your family?" she said, a faint hint of curiosity in her tone.

"Yeah. You'd like them. Especially my mom." he said with a smile.

"And why would you say that?" she asked.

"You're just like her." he said before parting to get to his next class. "Bye." Gaz watched him walk away before her brother came and stood next to her, trying to get her attention.

'Just like his mom?' she thought inwardly chuckling before walking off. 'No wonder he's tough.'

-Another part of skool-

One of the boys that was eyeing Gaz, a lanky teen with brown hair and fair skin, was walking to his locker while fuming in anger. Tak's words hadn't stopped buzzing in his head and it was driving him crazy.

"I can get any woman I want in this skool!" he grumbled to himself. "I can get _any_ woman I want in this whole fucking city!" He reached his locker and turned the dial before his cellphone vibrated. He growled before opening his locker and sticking his head inside to talk on the phone. "Who is this?" he grunted.

 _"Do you wanna fuck Gaz Membrane?"_ came a garbled voice.

"Huh?" said the teen in confusion. "Who is this?"

 _"Yes or no. Do you, Ronald Voto, want to have sex with Gazlene Membrane?"_ The teens eyes widened as this strange voice spoke his name.

"Um...well, yes. I do. But-"

 _"What if I told you that I can make that happen?"_ asked the voice.

"You what? Who is this?!" asked the teen.

 _"I'll contact you after your last skool period."_ said the voice before the line went dead. Ronald stared at his phone before the bell rung, telling him that class had begun. He hurriedly got his things, closed his locker, and went to class. As he sat in his seat, his mind went back to that strange call.

'Hmmm. A chance to fuck Gaz Membrane.' he thought as images of him violently screwing the hottest chick in town flashed through his mind. A dark smile came to his face as he ran the images through his mind some more. 'I don't know who that voice belonged to, but if he can make that happen, I couldn't care less.'


	5. Serious Derrick

Last period was by far the best period for Zim, Gaz, Dib, and Tak. Each of them were in their own class, which meant they didn't have to see each other until after skool. But that wasn't the best part. For none of them had Derrick in the same class last period, leaving them a little over an hour away from him. Finally, after all the chaos of the day, the final bell rang, signalling that the day was over. Most of the children ran out of the skool to enjoy themselves, leaving a handful of students behind to attend detention.

Gaz walked down the quiet hallway towards the detention room before walking inside and scowling. Sitting there were Zim, Dib, and Tak in different parts of the room away from each other. She sighed before she took her seat away from them all and waited for the teacher to walk in and write down that they were there.

"Good day you pathetic little worms." grunted the old woman as she walked in and slammed the door. She then walked to her desk and sat down before pulling out her notebook and clearing her throat. "Gaz Membrane!"

"Here."

"Dib Membrane!"

"Here."

"Tak Kiri!"

"Here."

"Zim Irk!"

"Zim is here!"

"Derrick M.!" The teacher looked at the room when she didn't hear a response before she narrowed her eyes. "Looks like one is abs-"

"Here." Everyone looked at the door as it opened, revealing a smiling Derrick. Everyone else had a scowl on their face before the teacher marked him present.

"Young man! Detention began 3 seconds ago! Any reason I shouldn't mark you as late, or even absent?" asked the teacher as she glared at him. Derrick only smiled before sticking a disc to her forehead, shocking her until she fell asleep in her chair.

"Nighty night!" Derrick said as he pulled off the disc before turning to leave.

"Hold on!" Dib yelled. "First the Principal, now Mrs. Tolk? What are you doing?"

"She marked me here, and that shock will keep her asleep until a little after detention's over." Derrick explained. "When she wakes up, she'll just think I left when the time was up. Later."

"Is that it? What if they wake up-"

"Look Fathead!" Derrick sighed as he looked at them. "I'm leaving because I'm not staying in one room only to sit on my ass and do nothing. You're free to stay here for the whole detention, or you can leave and let her believe you left when it was done as well. Either way, I'm gone." And with that, he left. The others just stared for a few moments before they walked out of the room.

-Outside-

Some kids were still outside talking to others as they either didn't want to get home immediately or were waiting for a lift before Gaz and the others walked out. They all cleared a path for her since they knew that getting in her way of anything was nothing short of suicidal. Gaz liked it this way, since it meant no one would bump into her as she played her GS4. She was already in the zone before she had taken her first step outside of skool and planned to stay there until dinner.

"That Dim guy bothers me." Dib said as he walked next to Gaz and Tak. Zim walked next to Gaz to be away from Dib as he started ranting. "Who is this guy?"

"I despise myself for saying this, but I...agree with you." Zim grumbled. "This hyuman is obviously different from the rest of the wretched filth that inhabitat this planet."

"I'm more interested in the technology in those discs we've seen him use." Tak added. "I don't think anyone on Earth besides Professor Membrane is capable of creating something like that."

"Can you all keep it down? I'm in the zone." Gaz growled as her thumbs worked their magic on the Game Slave 4.

"Don't you think Derrick's strange?" Dib asked.

"I think everyone's strange." Gaz told him, her eyes never leaving the screen.

"MEMBRANE!" came a nasily shout. Gaz growled as she and the others looked ahead of them to see a blob of a kid standing before them. Messy green hair, pasty greasy skin, bug eyes, and a lot of fat that was held in by clothes that were one or two sizes too small, causing them to strain against his fat. Gaz sighed as she opened one eye at the kid.

"What do you want Iggins?" she asked in annoyance.

"I...I..." Iggins wheezed out before sucking on an inhaler. "I'm here for a rematch!" he finally finished as he pulled out his Game Slave 4. Gaz only rolled her eyes in annoyance as the others stood by her side.

"I'm not in the mood to deal with you today Iggins, so piss off before I hurt you." Gaz threatened.

"NO! Not until I prove I'm the better gamer!" Iggins yelled.

"How many times has this...'human', challenged Gaz?" Tak asked Dib.

"Today makes 264." Dib answered in a dull tone while Zim stared in disgust at Iggins eyes as they bugged and moved around in his sockets.

"I've been going through hard training Gaz! And this time, I'm going to win!" Iggins yelled, making the others back away to avoid his spit that flew everywhere.

"Ugh, fine. I'll kick your ass again." Gaz grumbled. Iggins grinned as he and Gaz got their GS4s in sync and began to battle.

"This shouldn't take long." Dib said as he crossed his arms while Gaz and Iggins played their game. They watched as Iggins cocky grin turned to a concentrated look, then a surprised look, then a desperate before his game flashed red and he cried incoherent gibberish.

"HOW CAN I LOSE AGAIN?! I'VE TRAINED SO HARD!" Iggins cried.

"Pfft. Whiner." Gaz muttered as she placed her GS4 in her cleavage, her mood turning sour after having to deal with Iggins. "Dib. I'm going to Bloaty's. None of you follow me." she said before walking off.

"Alright." Dib answered before he and Tak left, leaving Zim to look at Iggins while laughing.

"Pathetic hyumans and their mindless...video games." he snickered before he left for his base.

-Atop the High Skool-

Two figures watched the scene before them from the ledge of the High Skool, the taller one smiling when he saw Gaz whip a fat kid's ass in gaming.

"Hehe. That was fun to watch." he laughed before he saw Gaz walk off by herself. His smile faded as a rare serious look crossed his face. He looked down at his associate, a little green monkey, before issuing an order. "Do you remember the plan?"

"Yes, Master Derrick." said the monkey with a salute before jumping off the roof, leaving Derrick alone to work.

"Gotta be careful here," he muttured as he looked at the sweat band on his left wrist before it began spark and change into a little timer. "3 hours, 22 minutes, and 17 seconds to go." he read before it switched back to a sweat band.

* * *

A/N: Not very long, but it's only to serve to set up future events.


	6. Saved by A Monkey?

It had been a couple of hours since Skool let out, and Dib and Tak were now inside the garage working on the new ship Tak arrived in years ago. The old one that Dib got a hold of when he was a kid had been torn apart by Gaz after he denied her the time to buy a game she'd waited ages to come out.

"Let's see...cross this wire here..." Dib mused as they both lay under the ship.

"Do you even know what your doing?" Tak asked as she looked at where he was crossing the wires on her ship.

"Oh, now what am I doing wrong?" Dib asked while looking at her.

"Where do I begin?" she replied with a smirk, earning an annoyed glare from Dib. "Relax. I'm just messing with you. Though you may want to redo the wires right there."

"Why? I'm just connecting the command module to the ship's systems." Dib explained.

"You've connected the ejector seat to the thrusters, you idiot." she said. Dib raised an eyebrow as he checked the wires before he realized she was right.

"Oops." he said with a nervous laugh.

"Here. Let me do it." she said as she pushed him over a bit and began to rewire her ship. Dib watched her three fingers easily shift the circuitry around into their proper places. "There. That should do...wait a second. Why is that over there? And this? Dib, what are all these strange parts?"

"I don't exactly have access to alien technology, so I had to use whatever I could get my hands on." he explained.

"Tell me. What made you think that any part of a toaster would help an Irken ship fly?" she asked.

"I tried to get spare parts whenever I break into Zim's base, but his stupid robot keeps breaking into my house to steal them back." Dib grumbled. Tak only sighed as she focused on her ship.

"Hold this up." she quickly said. Dib held up a part of a large metal tube while she carefully tried to disconnect the useless parts from her ship. "Keep that up until I say so. Got it?"

"Got it." he replied before she focused on the ship. Dib keep the tube out of the way while his eye drifted to Tak, his head not moving an inch. His gaze slowly moved down her body longer, examining every bit of her form lying next to him. He couldn't help but watch as her breasts subtly raised and lowered with each breath she took before he blinked hard and looked away.

'Stop that! Don't forget that she's an alien! The same species as Zim in fact!' he thought as he berated himself for thinking of Tak that way.

"Dib," came Tak's voice, breaking him away from his thoughts. He turned to see her staring at him with half lidded eyes, a small smile on her lips. "I know my form is pleasant to human eyes, but do you mind not staring like that?"

"What?!" he yelled as he lifted his head, slamming it into the ship above them. "Ow." he groaned as he rubbed his head, his eyes still on her. "I-I wasn't looking!" he denied.

"The blush on your face tells a different story." she chuckled before her hologram disappeared, revealing her Irken form. "There. That should help remind you that I'm not a human."

"...Thanks." he mumbled as he looked at the ship, trying his best not to release a sad sigh. 'The only girl that'll talk to me, and she and alien. Life suck.' he thought before he heard the garage door opening. Both of their eyes widened before Tak's hologram came back up. "Dad? Gaz?" he called out from under the ship as he looked to see a pair of boots walk towards the ship. He didn't get a response as someone climbed into the ship. "Hey! Who's there?" Dib called again before the ship fell to the ground, pinning the two of them down. "Hey! What's going on?!"

"I can't move my legs!" said Tak as she tried to lift her ship up with her Pak's spider legs. Both of them were now trying with all their strength to get out from under the ship before a computerized voice began to speak.

 _"Self-Destruct Sequence Activated! Time of detonation: T-minus 2 minutes! Half a nice day!"_

"What?!" Tak and Dib yelled as they tried harder to get out. "Shit! DAD! GAZ! ANYONE! HELP!"

"Mimi!" Tak yelled. A blue-ish appeared, revealing Tak's SIR unit in her cat hologram. Tak looked at her from under the ship as she cried out, "Quickly! Shut down the-" she didn't get to finish a pair of boots slammed down on Mimi, causing the poor SIR unit to spark and twitch, it's hologram disappearing.

"Sorry, but no one's coming to save you two freaks." came a voice as the boots backed off Mimi before kicking her across the room into the wall.

"MIMI!" Tak cried out in horror before growling. "When I get my claws on you, I'll rip your eyes off and feast upon them!"

 _"T-minus 1 minute, 30 seconds until detonation!"_

"Well, my work here is done. Bye." said the intruder before walking out the garage and closing the door, leaving the two of them to struggle.

'This can't be how it ends! If I die, then Zim will be free to enslave all mankind!' Dib thought as he frantically tried to dislodge himself from under the ship. The two of them were soon clawing at the metal in a desperate attempt to get out as the computer occasionally told them how long they had left to live.

 _"T-minus 1 minute before detonation!"_ said the computer voice.

"GRAAAAAH! THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!" Tak roared as she tried to lift the ship off the both of them again.

 _"T-minus 45 seconds until detonation!"_

"Tak, it's no use." Dib sighed in defeat.

"No! I'm not giving up!" she grunted.

 _"T-minus 30 seconds until detonation!"_ Dib closed his eyes as he waited for the explosion to come and end his life.

'Gaz. It's up to you now to stop Zim.' he thought. Just then, the sound of the garage door flying open came, followed by someone jumping into the spaceship.

"Wait! Who's there?!" Tak demanded.

 _"T-minus 10...9...8...Self-Destruct Sequence Deactivated!"_ Dib and Tak's eyes flew open as the computerized voice finished with, _"Have a Nice Day!"_

"We're...we're alive?" Dib asked himself in disbelief before the ship rose up a few inches, giving them just enough room to squeeze themselves out from under the ship. They carefully got out and examined themselves before sighing in relief.

"That...was close." Tak said before she hurriedly ran to Mimi. "Mimi! Respond!" she cried as she lifted her SIR unit in her arms. The little robot sparked as it's red eyes flashed on and off, it's entire frame twitching.

"Quick! We can use my dad's tools here and try to help her!" Dib told her as he opened the door that lead into his house. Tak quickly followed him to where his dad worked on his home projects and placed Mimi onto the table.

'Stay with me!' Tak thought as she began to work on Mimi while Dib ran to his room to get his laptop.

"She gonna be alright?" Dib asked as he opened it and began digging typing away.

"She's been badly damaged, but I can save her." Tak said, a smile on her lips. "Whoever that fool was that wrecked her and nearly killed us will pay for this!"

"Whoever they were didn't want to be found out." said Dib as he pulled up security footage of his home.

"Why do you have spy cameras in your own home?" Tak asked after a quick glance at the screen.

"In case Zim broke in here." Dib explained as rewound the footage, showing someone in a cloak and hockey mask entering the garage, climbing into the ship, dropping it on them, and smashing Mimi before leaving.

"I'm guessing it's not Zim." Tak surmised. "He's not intelligent enough to come here in a better disguise than his wig and contacts."

"Yeah, but who is this guy?" Dib asked as he watched the video.

"Better question. Who saved us?" Tak asked.

"I'm about to pull that up...there!" he said as he watched the camera feed. "Wait. Is that...a green monkey?"

"What?" Tak said in disbelief as she watched a green monkey jump into the cockpit of the ship, deactivate the Self-Destruct, and then have the ship lift off of them before leaving the area. Neither Dib nor Tak could understand what they just saw, leaving them both with just one thought.

'What's going on?'


	7. Virus

Zim had arrived on his street and was now walking up to his 'house' before opening the door.

"Welcome home, son!" greeted the Robo-Parents as Zim walked in and rid himself of his wig and contacts, revealing his antenna and ruby eyes.

"GIR!" Zim yelled the moment he saw the couch. Littered all over it were various take-out containers and pizza boxes, with Gir sitting on top of it all watching the TV. Gir looked at Zim before waving.

"HI MASTER!" Gir yelled.

"Why is the couch covered in so much filth?" Zim asked as he looked at the couch in disgust.

"I'm watchin the Angry Monkey Show Marathon!" Gir yelled in glee. "10 hours of nothing but the Angry Monkey!"

"Mmmhmm, yes. And that explains why the couch is in this state HOW?!" Zim asked in anger.

"Well I needed snacks while I was watching. Duh!" Gir answered as if Zim was stupid. Zim's eye twitched before he walked deeper into the house.

"I'm going down to the base Gir! Clean up that couch and don't disturb me!" Zim ordered before his toilet moved to the side, allowing his larger build to lower down to his base. Gir only smiled before scooping up leftover food off the couch and shoveling it into his mouth.

-Zim-

Zim had spent the last few hours in his lab, working on various ideas to destroy mankind, as well as working on a few experiments.

"Hmm, maybe I should invent a laser that'll increase Dib's alrighty GIGANTIC HEAD!" Zim yelled dramatically to himself as he tinkered with equipment.

"Master! Incoming Message!" came his computer's voice.

"A message? From the Tallests?" Zim asked.

"No. It appears to be anonymous." answered the computer.

"Anonymous? No one but the Tallests should know how to contact my base!" Zim said as he dropped what he was doing and walked towards the keyboard.

"What about Dib?" the computer asked. "Or his sister Gaz?"

"Squeek!"

"Mini-Moose has a point. There's also Tak."

"SILENCE!" Zim yelled. "Computer! Open the message so that my mighty EYES can read it!"

"Very well." the computer said in a bored tone before opening the message before Zim.

"Hmm?" Zim hummed in confusion before reading the message out loud. _"To the one known as Zim, I hope you look to the sky. And curse Derrick's name since it's his fault you die?"_

"WARNING! COMPUTER VIRUUUUSSS DETETETETECTED!" buzzed the computer as the screen turned to blurred static. Zim's head whipped around frantically as his base seemed to go completely bonkers around him. Zim immediately began to type away on the keyboard in an attempt to stop whatever was causing all this. "WARNINNNNNG! teST SUBject NNNNNUMbbbbbbbbbbber 48 conTAINMENT FiElD DOWn!"

"WHAT?!" Zim yelled in panic before a horrible screeching could be heard. "AAAAHHH! GIR! GET DOWN HERE! I COMMAND YOU!" Zim yelled into a microphone that sprang from his Pak. Zim immediately felt something fall on his head after the microphone went back in.

"Hi Master!" Gir yelled before looking around. "Are we throwing a party?"

"No Gir! The base has been infected by some computer virus!" Zim yelled before tendrils of wires began to flail about and strike at Zim. "I need you to defend me from the base and any experiments that come in here while I get this place under control!"

"Yes sir!" Gir saluted with red eyes before they turned cyan again and he began to play with the wires. "WEEEEE! LOOK AT ME!" he cried out as Zim began to type away on the keyboard.

"ACCESS DENIED!" cried out the computer, it's robotic voice much lower and garbled. "ADMIT DEFEAT AND DIE!" Zim glared at the computer before he suddenly fell face first on the keyboard. He looked up to see that a few wires had wrapped around his ankles before lifting him in the air. He screamed as the wires began to thrash around, slamming his body into the walls, screens, and equipment before dangling his body upside-down like a dead animal. Zim struggled to stay awake before he felt something horrible to him. His Pak, which was vital for any Irken to survive, had been ripped from his back.

"AAAAHHHHHH! RETURN MY PAK!" he cried out as he struggled to get free. "GIR! GET MY PAK NOW!"

"Okie Do-" Gir yelled before something came out of the floor and swallowed Gir whole. Zim watched as a horrible mutated monster of his creation called an Orcrat , a rat mixed with an orca whale, rise out of the floor and screech a terrible sound.

'This can't be happening!' Zim thought as everything just seemed to get worse with every passing moment. His base had a virus, his SIR unit was eaten, his Pak had been torn away from his body, and he was completely helpless to stop any of it. His eyes didn't leave the monster as it quickly eyed him before slowly advancing toward him. "NO! STAY BACK! I AM YOUR CREATOR! YOU MUST _OBEY ME!_ " Zim cried. The Orcrat paid him no heed as it lunged for him, it's jaw wide open ready to rip him apart. "AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" Zim yelled in fear. "AAAHHHHHH! AAAAAHHHHHHH! AAHHHHhhhhh?" Zim's voice lowered as he realized that the mutant was snapping it's jaws at him, but unable to reach him. Zim blinked as he saw a mass of wires wrap around the Orcrat's tail. "Eh?" Zim said before the wires holding him and his Pak in the air slowly lowered them to the floor, then wrapped around the creature to keep it in place.

"Sir! Are you alright?" the computer asked, it's tone back to normal.

"Well, I'm not being ripped to shreds." Zim snapped as he did a quick check on his Pak before reattaching it to his back. "Anyway, put this creature back in it's containment unit!"

"Sir, the containment unit that held this creature has been destroyed." stated the computer. Zim was ready to pull his antenna out before his eyes widened.

"GIR! CAN YOU HEAR ME?!" Zim yelled.

"Master! Where is you?" Gir asked stupidly from the creature's stomach. "It's dark in here!"

"Gir! Listen to me! I need you to release all the contents inside your body!" Zim ordered.

"Okaaaay!" Gir yelled.

"Pardon me for asking, but what's that going to solve?" asked the computer. Zim didn't respond as the flailing creature cried out in pain, it's belly slowly beginning to bloat out. "Oh..." said the computer while Zim's grin fell to a look of realization as the creature got huge. "...never mind."

-Outside-

It was early in the night outside, nothing much happening. Suddenly, a muffled boom was heard as the cars on the street jumped a few feet, causing their alarms to go off.

-In the base-

Zim was coughing and hacking as he began to dig his way out of a mixture of mutant guts, stuffed pig toys, and various other bits of garbage.

"Well THAT went well." the computer said sarcastically.

"SILENCE!" Zim yelled before turning to the computer. "I'm just glad you managed to get that virus problem handled before you killed me!"

"Actually, I'm afraid that I didn't stop the virus."

"Huh?"

"It appears that an outside source beamed some software directly into my mainframe. This software seems to have eradicated the virus that had infected me moments ago." the computer explained. Zim stared at the computer with a blank look on his face, his mind trying to process what just happened.

"Hmm. First a computer virus comes inside an anonymous message. Then new software is beamed into your mainframe just before I am destroyed." Zim thought out loud. "Wait. That message!"

"I'm already in the process of deleting it." said the computer.

"No! Read it out loud again!" Zim ordered.

"Master, the last time I opened that message-"

"DO IT!" Zim commanded.

"Hmph. Fine. But don't blame me if I try and kill you again." huffed the computer before displaying the message.

"Zim blah, blah, blah, sky. Yada, yada, there! That part about Derrick being the reason I'm to die!" Zim said as he pointed at the screen.

"Who's Derrick?" asked the computer while Zim glared at the screen.

"That is something...I intend to find out!"


	8. Gaz's Fury

Gaz enjoyed her time away from life inside Bloaty's Pizza Hog. She was standing in front of an arcade game enjoying herself. One hand was shoving pizza into her mouth, the other flawlessly kicking virtual ass on the game. She allowed a small smile on her lips as she had achieved a new High Score on the game before it faded when her empty hand reached to grab more pizza, but got nothing but air.

"Great," she sighed. "Out of quaters _and_ out of pizza."

"Excuse me?" Gaz turned to see a chubby female employee holding a pizza up to her. "Pizza for you Gaz."

"I already ate my pizza Sally." Gaz told him as she looked at the box.

"Compliments of one of your many fans." said the girl while wiggling her eyebrows before she snickered. Gaz rolled her eyes before taking the pizza box.

"Hmm. Far be it for me to turn down free pizza from this place." Gaz said before opening the box, revealing an X-Large double pepperoni pizza.

"That's your fifth X-Large in the past two hours." Sally said as she looked at the empty pizza boxes. "How do you eat that much and not look like me by now? I bet it goes straight to your breasts." she joked before walking away.

'I wonder what'd she say if I told her she was mostly right?' Gaz thought as she looked down at herself before shrugging and finished her slice. 'Guess this body of mine's not so bad.' she thought as an image of how big she would be if she was normal came to her mind, causing her to shiver. She then took the box and walk out the door before heading home, eating her pizza along the way. She walked for a good 10 minutes before the pizza was gone, leaving nothing but an empty box that she threw in a dumpster and turned down an alleyway for a shortcut. She was a good mile from home before her vision started to get blurry. She groaned as she rubbed her eyes before looking down at her arm. 'Why does my arm feel...heavy?' she thought before she noticed that her breathing had started to become labored and ragged. 'What the heck's going on? I shouldn't be this tir-' Her thoughts were interrupted as a sudden jolt of pain hit her stomach hard, causing her to lean against a building while holding her sides. "Fuck!" she cursed under her breath.

"Feeling okay?" Gaz looked behind her shoulder to see Ronald Voto standing there, an evil smirk on his face.

"Piss off!" she growled as she struggled to stand up straight. "I'm fine!"

"You don't look fine to me," Ronald said as he walked up behind her. "What's wrong? Something you _ate_?" Gaz raised an eyebrow before her eyes widened at what was in Ronald's hands. Within his grasp was the same pizza box that she had thrown away after leaving Bloaty's. "5 X-Large pizzas can't be good for the stomach."

"That pizza...was from you?" she asked before another surge of pain hit her.

"Beautiful _and_ smart." Ronald said as Gaz had a bad coughing fit. "Need some help?"

"Screw *cough* you!" she growled between coughs.

"Why don't you let me help you?" he asked as he extened his hand towards her, only for Gaz to swat it away. "Ooh, fiesty!" he chuckled before Gaz swiftly planed her knee between his legs. "GYAAAH!" he screamed as his hands shot between his legs while he curled into a fetal position.  
"Mmmph! You rotten bitch!" he squeeked.

"Hehehehe! Even when weakened, she's still more than a little turd like you can handle." Gaz and Ronald looked to see a very tall, brown skinned fat man walking towards them. He wore a blue shirt, black jeans, and combat boots. His dreadlocks were tied behind him in a ponytail as he grinned down at them, his massive arms folded over his chest.

"Oh...great! Who are you?" Gaz hissed as she tried to fight back the pain coursing through her.

"Ed...Edgar!" Ronald squeeked as he moved to all fours. "You said that she'd be too weak to move after I gave her that pizza!"

'So, this guy's the one behind the weird pizza?' Gaz thought as another jolt of pain hit her.

"I said that she'd be too _hurt_ to move," Edgar stated. "I guess that I should've given you more poison to apply to her pizza."

"Poison?" Gaz growled.

"Yes," Ronald said as he lifted her up by her hair with one arm. "It's a very special poison given to me by an associate that utterly despises you. In a matter of hours, your body will be reduced to a vegatative state. Or sex doll with a body like yours." Gaz glared at Edgar in rage before it twisted into cold fury when she felt a pair of hands grab her breasts from behind her.

"Oh, wow! These things are like pillows!" Ronald said in glee as he fondled Gaz. "I'm gonna enjoy tonight!"

"If you don't get your hands off me this instant, I'm going to-"

"Yeah, yeah. Plunge us into a Nightmare World. Blah, blah, blah." Edgar drolled on before he reached his fingers between her breasts and pulled out her GS4. "Sorry bitch! But the only thing you're going to do is take whatever this fool plans to do to you and like it before that poison melts your body from the inside." He then dropped her to the ground, where she lightly twitched while glaring daggers up at them. "Looks like the paralysis has finally kicked in." he said as they both men looked down at Gaz.

"If you have anyone to blame, blame that bitch Tak for saying I couldn't get any woman." Ronald sneered. "Wait until she finds out that I got Gaz Membrane all to myself."

"I'm...going...to kill you!" Gaz growled as Edgar walked away.

"Have fun with your new toy." he called as he waved his arm without looking back. "And thanks for the souvenir."

"Oh, I will." Ronald said as he began to undo his pants. Gaz's eyes widened as she lay on the ground. She kept glaring and growling, though she couldn't help but feel a tiny, yet horrible sense of fear creeping into her. This hadn't been the first time anyone tried to force themself onto her, but it was the first time someone had enough brains to weaken her first. She watched him drop his pants with a wicked smile before she saw his penis, and couldn't help the small chuckle that crept out of her throat.

"What? That's it?" she asked as she looked at his small dick.

"Laugh all you want," he said. "Cause you'll be sucking on it soo-"

BAM!

Before he or Gaz knew what had happened, something smashed right into Ronald's face, sending the teen flying back. Gaz's eyes widened in shock before she looked up, but her vision had gotten so blurry by then that she couldn't make out who just saved her.

"Who?" she muttered in shock as he pulled out a small bottle and gently lifted her into a sitting position and brought it to her lips.

"Drink this." said the stranger as they slowly poured the contents into her mouth. "It'll nullify the poison." Gaz drank every drop before she began to feel slightly better. The pain was beginning to fade from her body, her breathing returned to normal, and her strength started to return. She felt the stranger gently lift her up onto her feet and support her until she could stand on her own. She turned to look at them, but her blurred vision prevented her to see anything but a silohuette run off. By the time her vision came back, the only one's left were her and Ronald, who was fumbling around on the ground holding his broken nose and screaming profanities to the sky.

"Fuck! My nose! It's broken!" he yelled in pain as he stumbled to get up and pull his pants up. "Who the fuck was-" his voice died in his throat when he saw a dark aura surrounding Gaz, her cold amber eyes staring right into his soul. "...mommy!"

-One hour later-

Policemen were blocking off an area that was covered in blood and fist prints with yellow tape while an ambulance drove off, a mangled body wheezing in unimaginable pain in the back.

"Poor kid," said one of the medical men in the back as he looked at the bleeding hole where the teen's manhood should be. Said manhood laid in a cooler of ice in multiple bloody pieces.

-With Gaz-

It was now late at night as Gaz stormed into her house, stomped upstairs, walked into her room and locked the door before proceeding to the bathroom to wash her hands of skin and blood. Never had she ever been so enraged by anyone before. Not ever her brother and Zim yelling and fighting right next to her had been so bad. She then dried her hands before walking out, stripping herself, and flopping down onto her bed. She was glad that Ronald was never going to forget the pain of this day, but her anger hadn't faded in the slightest. Rage coursed through her body as Edgar's image flashed through her mind. She made a promise to herself that if she ever found Edgar again, she was going to torture the name of whoever gave him that poison she ingested, and then kill both of them.

-Edgar-

Edgar was in a dark room, a blank screen before him. He pushed a button before the word 'CONNECTING' came onto the screen. After a few moments, a line came upon the screen.

 _"What is it Edgar?"_ came an angry voice. " _I told you not to call until you've completed your assignment!"_

"I have," Edgar stated. "Dib and Tak should be nothing but little pieces in the Membrane garage while Zim is digested in that filthy abomination's stomach. As for Gaz, she's going to suffer a fate worse than death for the rest of her days."

 _"They're still alive!"_ growled the voice.

"Impossible!" Edgar yelled. "I did everything you said!"

 _"You failed to fulfill the most crucial order! To stay and make sure that the targets were destroyed!"_ the voice stated.

"But that can't be!" Edgar said. "According to the data you gave me, nothing should've interfered!" The voice only growled in frustration at Edgar's failure.

 _"Enough excuses! You've failed, so I'm sending someone else! Return to base! That's an order!"_ said the voice before cutting out. Edgar only glared at the screen before pulling a device out of his pocket.

"I don't know how you all escaped, but you're gonna wish you died the way I left you!" he growled before pushing a button, then disappearing in a flash of light.


	9. The Next Day

Dib had spent a restless night lying in bed thinking about the events of yesterday. The strange new kid, the ship nearly killing them, the green monkey.

'A green monkey.' he thought with furrowed eyebrows. 'No species of ape has that kind of colored fur. And that monkey and that strange hulking figure both knew how to operate an Irken spaceship with ease.' He kept pondering about this before his alarm clock began to buzz. Dib's eyes widened as he looked at the digital clock reading 6:00 A.M. He groaned when he realized that he'd spent the entire night without any sleep. He rubbed his eyes before getting himself ready for the skool day. He walked out in his usual attire with a yawn before walking towards Gaz's door. He was about to knock, but froze when he felt a horrible feeling of terror suddenly crawl down his spine, the kind of feeling that only his sister could give when she was pissed beyond reason. He stood there frozen for a solid minute before his arm slowly lowered back to his side. 'Maybe not the best time to bother her.' he thought as he went downstairs to eat breakfast.

"Good morning son." Professor Membrane greeted in-person as he began making toast. "Where is your sister?"

"She's awake...I think." Dib said as he got some orange juice. "I think she's really pissed about something. I can practically feel her anger oozing out of her door."

"Hmm. Well, she better get down here before her toast gets cold." said Professor  
Membrane as he placed a big stack of toast on the table before taking one and walking off.

"I just hope she's not cold either today." Dib mumbled before he felt the house shake as something stomped downstairs. She wore the same necklace and footwear, but different clothes. She wore simple dark blue skinny jeans that showed off her ass, a black tank top that exposed her belly, and grey arm warmers with black stripes running horizontally down them. "Hey Gaz." Dib greeted her as she walked into the kitchen, and was promptly ignored. She walked to the fridge, poured herself some orange juice, then violently slammed the door shut. 'Yeah, still not a good time to talk to her.'

"Gazlene! Please keep your temper in check." Professor Membrane scolded when he walked in and saw the broken fridge door. Gaz's arms trembled in anger before they stopped.

"Sorry." she muttered before walking past them and out the door towards Skool.

"Your sister seems quite frazzled by something," Professor Membrane said to Dib before the lab called him. "Well son, the world needs me. I'll be off now. Have a good day at Skool!" he said with a wave as he walked out the door, leaving Dib alone. Dib just sat there quietly before finishing his breakfast and walking towards Skool.

'At least it's Friday.' he thought as he slumped over.

-Skool-

It was the usual at High Skool witht he kids outside yammering on and on before they had to attend class. The kids all slowly began to fall silent as Gaz came into view, a murderous aura around her being as she walked towards the building. No one dared to say anything even after she disappeared into the skool building, still too afraid that their words might reach her. They only looked before they heard someone else walking and turned to see Dib walking towards the High Skool.

"No one's dead." Dib said warily as he looked around before walking to the Skool building, Tak waiting up on the stairs for him.

"What's with her?" Tak asked quietly. "Did you take the last soda again?"

"No. I didn't do anything. She woke up like...this." Dib said as they walked through the hallways before he yawned.

"Up all night with your paranormal studies again?" Tak asked.

"No. I didn't get any sleep. I couldn't get what happened yesterday off my mind." Dib said before shaking his head to wake himself up. "How's Mimi?"

"I've gotten most of her repaired, but I need to finish later tonight." Tak answered before Dib bumped into someone they didn't want to see. "Hello, Zim." Tak spat.

"You dare run into Zim?!" Zim yelled dramatically. "Do your eyes not function even with those glasses of yours?"

"My eyes are fine you *yawn* rotten alien!" Dib yelled. Zim looked ready to retort his usual 'I'm normal' speech, but instead just growled at them.

"You're lucky I have no time to deal with you Dib-worm!" Zim snapped. "I have to find that blasted Derrick!"

"What did he do? Throw some of the Skool's breakfast oatmeal at you?" Tak chuckled before the bell rang.

"Just talk to him second period." Dib yawned before smacking his own face a few times. "I'm off to class." he said before the three of them split.

-Gaz-

Gaz's anger was still present as everyone in class was utterly silent, save for the teacher passing out today's assignment. He passed them out before stopping at Derrick's seat with a raised eyebrow.

"Mmmmmabsent?" he asked.

"Um..." one of the children said in a quiet voice with their hand raised. "Derrick's in the bathroom, but...he's acting kinda strange."

"Mmmm." hummed the teacher before the door was kicked open, scaring all but Gaz. Everyone looked to see Derrick standing in the doorway. His head was down, but his whole body was trembling where it stood. "Mmmmlate." said the teacher as he approached Derrick. Derrick's only response was to jerk his head up at him, a crazed look on his face as he eyes occasionally twitched. "Mmmmmfirst offense. Uhhhhnnntake seat."

"Okayokayokayokay!" Derrick said rapidly as he quickly walked to his seat, sat down, placed his head on his desk, and covered it with his arms. Everyone looked at him as he just sat there mumbling incoherent gibberish and twitching in his seat.

"Mmmmtest results." grunted the teacher before he began passing out the tests. Everyone soon had their tests back, which caused a lot of groaning.

"Another D." one groaned

"Better than an F." another whispered.

"Finally! I got a B!" cheered another kid before the others began to share their answers. Gaz looked at her A+ with an eye roll, not really caring as she was still pissed about yesterday.

"Hey new kid. How'd you do?" one of them asked while looking at Derrick. Derrick hadn't moved from where he sat, his test lying on his head. "Hey...new kid?" the kid asked in concern before tapping his arm.

"3MEATCUSTARDPIE!" Derrick shouted as he flailed in his seat before he fell out. Everyone looked at him as he lay on the ground unmoving. The kid who tapped him opened his mouth to say something, but stopped when Derrick suddenly sprung up and got within an inch of his face, shocking the kid. "...don't touch me." Derrick whispered with wide eyes before slowly slinking into his seat.

"I just wanted to know how you did on the test." the kid answered while leaning a bit away. Derrick looked at him before looking at his test.

"I got an A+." Derrick said.

"Wow," one of the kids said. "First test here and you ace it. Not bad."

"Not really. I did stuff like this when I was 5." Derrick said, his body still trembling.

"By the way, why are you so twitchy?" one of the kids dared to ask. Derrick's head snapped toward the kid, a smile back on his face that caused some of them to flinch.

"I woke up late after doing a lot of shit last night," Derrick said. "I had a bad breakfast. A jumbo bag of sour gummi toads and 2 large Poop Colas."

"Sheesh, that's a lot of sugar!"

"Mmmmlesson." said the teacher, silently telling the children to be quiet and to pay attention. The kids watched the board in boredom except Gaz, who only stared down at her breasts, her thoughts on her missing GS4 that should be there. She quietly growled before lying her head down in her arms, not wanting to deal with anyone at all. Her thoughts were broken when she heard something hit her desk. She looked up to see a folded note in front of her.

'Probably just another love note.' she thought as she looked to see the teacher looking away before unfolding it and reading it. Gaz lifted an eyebrow at the note, not just because of what was written, but how it was written. It was haphazard, sloppy, and almost unreadable, but she was still able to read it. She quietly put the note away before turning her attention back to the lesson. 50 minutes later of listening to the teacher grunt and write equations on the board, the students all got up and left for their next class. Gaz quickly moved through the hallways for a moment before stopping in front of a locker. She pulled the note out before reading what was written.

 _After class, go to the East Halls, Locker 143C. Enter combination 18-05-23. Gift for you. Tell no one!_

Gaz shrugged before she waited for the hallway to be clear of students. When no one was around, she entered the combination and opened the locker. The locker was bare, save for a small white box inside. She took the box and looked it over to see if it came with a stupid card that spouted eternal love to her and other mushy shit. She shrugged as she opened the box before her eyes widened, her anger leaving her body. If you listened carefully, you could've heard angels sing at that moment.


	10. Disfunctional Derrick

A/N: REALLY short, but it was just aggravating having it in my head, so I wrote it out. Here you go.

* * *

-Second Period-

Class was a few minutes away from starting, leaving the kids to talk to each other before they had to begin working. Zim entered and looked around the room before his eyes stopped at Derrick and Dib, both with their heads down for different reasons. He marched right up behind them before making his presence known.

"Awake and tell Zim what he demands to know!" Zim snapped. Dib raised his head and looked at Zim, his lack of sleep evident in his glare.

"What do you want now Zim?" Dib barked.

"I was not talking to you," Zim said before turning to Derrick, who had been twitching and mumbling in his seat. "Derrick! Answer Zim!" Derrick's only response was to mumble and fidget in his seat.

"Chunkypeanutapplecorndogs!" Derrick whispered as he messed with his hair.

"Dude, you okay?" one of the kids asked.

"I heard that he was like this during first period." one of the girls said. "He's all hopped up on sugar."

"Alright everyone," the teacher interrupted. "It's time for class, so please pay attention to the board. Zim, return to your seat."

"Grr. Yes sir!" Zim growled before sitting in his own seat while the teacher wrote -POP QUIZ- on the board, making the kids groan. The teacher handed out the quizzes before returning to his desk and turning the dial on an egg timer.

"Alright everyone! Begin!" said the teacher. Everyone was now working on their paper in quiet, with an occasional grunt from Derrick. After about five minutes of hearing him make noises, the teacher stood up and walked over to Derrick, who was trembling and gibbering on about toothpaste. "Young man. Is there something wrong?" he asked. Derrick slowly looked up at the teacher, his eyes wide and bloodshot.

"I'm...fine!" Derrick answered, a huge grin on his face. The teacher raised an eyebrow before clearing his throat.

"Well then, care to follow everyone's example and do your quiz?" the teacher asked.

"You mean this thing?" Derrick asked, holding up his quiz sheet. "Done!"

"Done?" the teacher said in confusion before looking over his quiz, only to be shocked that it was both done _and_ correct. "That's amazing!"

"Not really! I can do this stuff in my sleep!" Derrick said before belching and slamming his head against the desk.

"Dude, you're crazy!" one of the other kids stated.

"YES! I! AM!" Derrick yelled before standing up. "How do you think anything gets done? How do you think people invent, discover, or learn?!"

"Please sit down." the teacher said as Derrick walked around and ranted on.

"It's because they do something CRAZY!" Dim yelled. "Crazy people do amazing things because they don't listen to that little voice in them that says 'This is a bad idea!' I NEVER LISTENED TO THAT VOICE SINCE THE DAY I WAS BORN! HAHAHAHA!" He then jumped onto this desk and threw his arms out wide. "AND I IMPLORE YOU ALL TO STOP LISTENING TO THE VOICES THAT TELL YOU THAT YOU CAN'T DO SOMETHING! YOU WANNA DO SOMETHING?! DO IT! LIKE THIS!" And to everyone's shock and awe, he ran and jumped out the window and began running around in circles flapping his arms. "I'M A LEMUR! FEED ME! RIBBIT RIBBIT!" The other kids shock soon turned into the laughter while the teacher yelled for him to get back inside. The only ones who weren't yelling or laughing were Dib and Zim.

'Holy cow! This guy's lost his freaking mind!' Dib thought.

'This deranged human is the reason I was nearly killed?' Zim thought.

"Enough!" yelled the teacher. "Derrick! Dim! Whoever you call yourself! Get back in this classroom and stop acting like this!"

"SUCK IT! YOU AIN'T MY MOM!" Derrick laughed, making a few jaws drop.

"THAT'S IT!" the teacher roared. "I WILL NOT TOLERATE BEING SPOKEN TO IN SUCH A MANNER! I'M GOING TO PERSONALLY SEE TO IT THAT YOU'RE EXPELLED!" That seemed to get Derrick's attention, for he stopped what he was doing and stared at the teacher.

"Is that a fact?" Derrick asked before he jumped through another window and stood in front of the teacher.

"That's right!" the teacher yelled.

"Well, I bet I can change your mind!" Derrick grinned before putting his left hand on the teacher's forehead and shut his eyes. "Hmmm!" he grunted, as if thinking hard. "You will not expel me!"

"Silly Dirt-Monkey!" Zim chuckled.

"I will not expel you." the teacher droned, surprising the children.

"You're going to take a nap until lunch, and give everyone here an A on their quizzes!" Derrick commanded.

"I'm going to take a nap until lunch, and give everyone here an A on their quizzes." the teacher repeated.

"Whoa! Is he hynotizing him?" one of the kids asked.

"Good. Now, play a tune with your armpits!" Derrick said with a grin. The teacher said nothing before he moved his arms and began to play music with his armpits, making the kids burst into laughter. Derrick's grin widened before he removed his hand, a mesh of metallic wiring sliding off his palm and back into his sweat band. "I'M OUT!" he yelled before running out the door. The children only cheered at Derrick's accomplishments, leaving a confused a bewildered Zim and Dib to wonder what just happened.


	11. Suspicions of Derrick

Tak sighed as she walked into her 3rd Period class, hoping that the teacher would be in a less cranky mood. After yesterday's near death experience, she didn't want to deal with anymore bullshit. She sat in her seat as the teacher wrote today's assignment on the board, the other students walking in as well before the bell rang.

"Today's lesson will be about the French Revolution." the teacher explained before eyeing Derrick's empty desk. "Hmm. I see our newest student is absent."

"Um..." said a student as he raised his hand, making the teacher glare at him. "Eep! Uh, he's in the bathroom!"

"Hmph! Well, it's another detention for that," she said as she returned to the board before growling, "Of course. Out of chalk!" She then turned and walked towards the door. "Read the lesson while I get more chalk! And no talking!" she snapped before opening the door and walking down the hall. Most of the class then began to talk while the last few actually began to read the lesson.

"Hey, anyone hear about Derrick today in Second Period?" one of the kids asked.

"Are you kidding? Everyone's heard about it!"

"He's completely crazy!"

"I KNOW I AM!" Everybody turned to see Derrick closing the door to the classroom before locking it. He then whipped himself around to stare at the class, a mad look in his eyes. Everyone was staring back before he began sniffing the air like a dog, then actually got on all fours and sniffed around on the floor. "I know there's something in here! I can smell it!" he whispered to himself as he began crawling under desks, making the children jump in shock.

"Dude, what are you looking for?" one of them asked. Derrick stood straight up, knocking a desk off himself and onto another one before looking at the kid. His body was trembling, foam was present at the edge of his lips, and his eyes were twitching as he reached out and pulled the guy up close.

"I...NEED...s-s-s-s-sugar." he said, whispering and stuttering the last part.

"You need...what?" the kid asked as he, and the others, stared in confusion.

"I ate a lot of sugar this morning! I can feel the crash coming! ICAN'TCRASHNOWIGOTTHINGSTODOLATER!" he shouted while shaking the teen before letting him go and opening the guy's backpack.

"Hey! You can't root through other's stuff!" the teen protested. Derrick didn't listen to him as he sifted through the kid's stuff. "What are you, deaf?!"

"HASKOILPAGRF!" Derrick shouted.

"Husky...what?" the kid asked. Derrick growled before slapping himself and glaring at the guy.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" Derrick shouted before running out the door, breaking it off it's hinges. A few of them looked out the hole before they all began to talk about what just happened. The only silent one was Tak, who was staring at the hole of Derrick with wide eyes.

'Did he just...no! It can't be!' she thought as she shook her head.

"WHAT HAPPENED?!" shrieked the teacher as she stood in the doorway gaping at the damaged door.

"Derrick." the class said in unison. The teacher just gaped at the door before a calm look came over her face. She quietly walked in, took out some paper, wrote her resignation, and left the room.

"Not worth it." she muttered to herself.

-Lunch-

Lunch was the usual. Loud teens eating food, talking, or sleeping with the constant chatter as white noise. Off on a table to themselves were the usual group of Dib, Tak, Gaz, and Zim.

"Where is that strange hyuman?" Zim asked as he looked around at the horde of filthy creatures.

"Why are you so fixated on him today?" Dib asked with a yawn.

"That is none of your concern, Dib-Stink!" Zim growled.

"What? You gonna try and experiment on the new kid?" Dib guessed. "He made be strange, but he's still a human! I won't let you use him as a lab rat!"

"Silence your big head!" Zim snapped as they continued with their bickering.

"Quiet Dib. I'm in the zone." Gaz said, her eyes nearly closed and focused on her game.

"You are?" Dib asked while he blinked. "Huh. Now that I think about, you don't look so...angry. What _was_ that about earlier this morning?"

"None of your business!" Gaz growled.

"What is with the both of you?" Dib asked as he looked at them both. "You usually tell us when something makes you angry," he said to Gaz before looking at Zim. "And you like to brag about your plans." The both of them glared at him, making him sink in his seat before looking at Tak. "Tak! A little help here?" he whispered to her. Tak didn't respond as her gaze was fixated on her hands. "Tak?"

"Haskoilpagrf." she said, her eyes not leaving her hands.

"Why do you need sugar?" Zim asked her.

"What?" Dib asked.

"Haskoilpagrf." Tak repeated as she finally looked up at Dib. "It means, 'Where's the sugar?' in Irken."

"Oh. Well, they do have pudding in the lunch line, but it's not very good." Dib said while pointing at the line.

"No, I don't need any sugar!" she said. "It's something that Derrick shouted in class."

"Derrick?" Zim and Dib asked in unison before glaring at each other.

"How would this Derrick hyuman know how to speak Irken?!" Zim asked.

"I don't know!" Tak snapped.

"Maybe it's a coincidence?" Dib suggested. "He has been acting really crazy today."

"He was demanding sugary snacks from the other kids and acted like it was a slip of the tongue when he spoke those words." Tak explained.

"First the incident at my base, now this?" Zim said out loud.

"What about your base?" Dib asked with a glare, recieving a glare right back from Zim.

"If you must know, a strange message was sent to my base." Zim said. "The moment I finished reading it, my computer caught a virus, causing my entire lab to try and kill me!"

"Wait a minute! _You_ were almost killed yesterday?" Dib asked.

"That's right. And the message said that it was Derrick's fault." Zim growled. "That's why I've been seeking answers from him."

"That's weird." Dib said with a thoughtful look on his face.

"Hmm. I thought you'd be overjoyed to see Zim dead." Gaz said, her eyes never leaving her game.

"Only after I've cut him open on an autopsy table!" Dib said with a smile while looking at her before he finally noticed her game. "Hey...that's not your normal Game Slave."

"You're right," Gaz said. "It's the next generation. The Game Slave 5!"

"How'd you get that? I thought they weren't available for months." Dib said.

"Don't know. Don't care." she said.

"Hmm. So Zim was nearly killed, we were nearly killed, Gaz has a new Game Slave, and Derrick can speak Irken." Tak summed up. "I think it's time to speak with Derrick."

"You were almost killed?" Zim asked.

"Yes." Dib answered. "We were working on Tak's ship before someone came in, moved it on top of us, and set the Self-Destruct."

"And they nearly destroyed Mimi." Tak added.

"Then how are you two alive?" Zim asked.

"Would you believe us if we told you it was a monkey that saved us?" Tak asked with a smile, her head leaning in her hand on the table.

"A monkey?" Zim said in disbelief.

"It's true! A monkey jumped in, turned off the Self-Destruct, got the ship off us, then took off." Dib said.

"So all three of you were nearly killed yesterday?" Gaz asked, her attention finally on them as she paused her game.

"Yeah," Dib said before his eyes widened. "Did anything happen to you?" he asked her.

"...No." Gaz said, her eyes back on her game. There was _no way_ she was going to tell anyone that she had been poisoned and nearly raped. Especially not Dib. He'd never leave her alone. Dib looked ready to continue before the lunch door flew open with a loud bang, making everyone jump. They turned to see Derrick standing there, a wild look in his eyes that made him looked completely insane.

"PUUUUDDDDDIIIIINNNNNGGG!" he roared before running past everyone and up to the line, where he submerged his head in the vat of rice pudding, his legs kicking and dancing in the air. The other kids either gaped or laughed at the sight as Derrick ate the pudding before coming up for air. "Oh...sweet, sweet pudding!" he moaned before sticking his head back in again.

"Hey kid!" the lunchlady yelled. Derrick looked up at her from the pudding as she hollered, "That's meant to be served to all the kids!"

"MY RICE PUDDING!" Derrick snapped before grabbing the vat and running away with it.

"GET BACK HERE!" the lunchlady yelled as she began to chase Derrick around the cafeteria, the students all yelling and cheering Derrick on. Zim, Gaz, Dib, and Tak just watched in silence as Derrick laughed his ass off between bites.

"It's like he doesn't give a shit!" Dib stated while Zim and Tak watched carefully. They could feel that Derrick was more than just an idiot, and they wanted answers.

"I propose a temporary truce," Zim suddenly said, getting the attention of the other three. "At least for a little while."

"For what?" Dib asked.

"To figure out who exactly this Derrick hyuman is." he answered.

"As much as I detest you Zim, I agree." Tak said.

"Fine." Dib growled. "But this doesn't change anything! I'm still gonna expose you!"

"Eh, whatever." Gaz shrugged. Zim nodded before they all took one last look at Derrick, who was now throwing the pudding back at the lunchlady like a monkey on speed.


	12. Crazy Weekend Ahead

It was now 4th Period once again, which meant Gym Class had rolled around. All the students were in their uniform and were either talking or waiting for the Gym teacher to start class.

"ALRIGHT MAGGOTS," shouted the teacher as he walked in. "YOU'VE ALL PROBABLY HEARD BY NOW THAT ONE OF OUR STUDENTS, RONALD VOTO, HAS BEEN HOSPITALIZED AFTER BEING ASSAULTED BY AN UNKNOWN PERSON OR GANG!" The students muttered to each other about that except for Gaz, who allowed a dark smile to creep onto her lips. "BECAUSE OF THIS, HIS PARENTS HAVE DECIDED THAT THIS CITY IS TOO DANGEROUS ARE WILL BE MOVING WHEN RONALD IS STABLE ENOUGH! NOW, ON TO TODAY'S ACTIVITY! THE SUN IS OUT, THE WEATHER IS NICE, AND THE AIR IS WARM! THAT'S RIGHT! TODAY, YOUR PUDGY LITTLE BUTTS ARE GOING TO BE DOING LAPS!" The children groaned at the notion of running around in circles as the teacher lead them all outside to large field. "FOR THE NEXT HOUR, WHETHER YOU WALK OR RUN, YOU WILL GIVE ME 25 LAPS! EACH LAP UNDER THE REQUIRED AMOUNT WILL COUNT AS 8% OFF YOUR SCORE! THOSE WHO GET UNDER 20 LAPS WILL RECIEVE AN F FOR TODAY! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!"

"Yes." the children drolled out, making the teacher sneer at them.

"WHAT KIND OF AN ATTITUDE IS THAT?!" roared the teacher before seeing Derrick all jumpy and twitchy while running in place. "IF ANY OF YOU SACKS OF FAT HAD HALF THE NEW KID'S ENTHUSIAM, YOU'D SEE THE BENEFITS OF THIS ACTIVITY! NOW GET READY TO RUN!" The children all lined up and got into position to run. They waited for a moment before the teacher blew the whistle, sending them off to run. Everyone started out the same before most of them began to lose stamina. More than half of the children began to lag behind and just walk, leaving a few good runners in the middle, with our favorite characters way out in front.

"What's wrong Dib-Worm? That gigatic head of yours slowing you down?" Zim spat as he, Dib, Gaz, and Tak ran close together.

"My head's not big!" Dib yelled before they began to yell as much as they ran.

"Focus you idiots!" Tak snapped at them. "Did you already forget that we have a truce on at the moment?" Both boys glared at each other before looking ahead, focusing on the track. "We have to figure out who Derrick is. Then you two can go back to trying to kill each other."

"Speaking of Derrick, where is he?" Gaz said while looking at the group of kids that were running on the track.

"That's weird," said Dib as he looked behind them. "I thought he'd be ahead of us considering how hyperactive he's been acting today."

"He is ahead of us. He's so far ahead that he's coming up behind the stragglers. See?" she said while pointing to the other side of the track. They looked to see Derrick was indeed running up behind them, then through the group, then in front before he began to gain on them.

"He is definitely different from you hyumans." Zim observed as Derrick soon ran up right behind them.

"Hey guys!" he said with a smile before running neck and neck with them. "Nice day for a run, right?"

"Well, you seem calmer than earlier." Tak mused.

"Yeah, sorry about that," Derrick apologized with a chuckle. "I tend to go a little nutty when I eat too much sugar."

"If _that_ was a little nutty, I'm afraid to know what a lot is!" Dib said as they ran.

"And you're not going crazy because?" Gaz questioned.

"All that sugar's being used because I'm running instead of sitting on my ass in a classroom!" Derrick laughed before whispering to them. "Hey, try not to get angry, but the men behind you and on the other side of the track are all staring at you." Tak turned her head and looked back at the group of men that had their eyes on her's and Gaz's asses, making her roll her eyes while looking ahead.

"They always stare at us." Gaz muttered in annoyance as she eyed the men on the other side of the track looking at breasts jiggle as she ran.

"It's nothing new." Tak added in equal annoyance.

"Actually, some of them are staring at you two." he said while looking at Zim and Dib. Both boys looked back at the group behind them in confusion, causing Derrick to burst into laughter. "I can't believe you fell for that!" The look on their faces even made Gaz and Tak chuckle.

"Very funny!" Dib spat.

"I thought it was." Derrick grinned.

"Enough of your sick humor! Tell Zim what he wants to know!" Zim snapped.

"Okay...what do you want to know?" Derrick asked.

"Yesterday, someone made an attempt on my life." Zim started off, leaving the details about his base out of the question. "They left a message stating that it was your fault. Why is that?"

"You wouldn't believe me." was all Derrick said before running on ahead.

"Hey!" Zim snapped before growling to himself. "Blasted hyuman!"

"Maybe he doesn't like talking to aliens!" Dib chuckled, making Zim glare at him before Gaz and Tak ran between the both of them.

"Knock it off!" Gaz snapped, clearly reaching her limit with their nonsense. "If all of you want to know about him, why not visit where ever he lives?"

"We don't know where he lives." Dib answered.

"Then we follow him after skool, you idiot." Gaz told him before running ahead of them, not wanting to hear them talk anymore. She could hear the three of them talk, shout actually, as they discussed what they were going to do after skool and sighed in irritation. Whatever they did, she'd probably get dragged along by Dib.

-Later-

It was now nearing the end of the final period of skool, meaning that everyone was itching for the last few minutes to tick away so they could enjoy their weekend.

'Hurry up!' Zim mentally shouted while glaring at the clock. Gaz didn't care since she was playing away on her Game Slave. Tak was tapping her fingers against her desk with a sigh, and Dib was thinking of what he might need to possibly break into Derrick's home should the need arise. Before they could leave however, an announcement had come over the PA system.

"Good Afternoon students," came the voice of the Principal. "I know all of you are wanting to leave and enjoy the weekend, but I've got a guest speaker here with us today."

"Greetings children!" came another voice, making Dib and Gaz's eyes widen.

'Dad?!' they both thought in surprise.

"My name is Professor Membrane! I've come here to personally announce that a week from now, every student from Kindergarten to College will be taking a test personally created by myself. The reason as to why you'll be taking this test will be announced 3 days after the test! Good luck, and don't forget to study! That is all!" the Professor finished before the bell rang, leaving the kids free to leave for the weekend. Gaz and Dib were walking quickly through the halls towards the exit to catch up to their father, who surprised them by waiting for them by the car.

"Hey Dad," said Gaz as they neared the car.

"Good to see you Dib and Gazlene." greeted their father before opening the door for them. "Get inside. We have something to discuss."

"Now?" Dib questioned. "But we have to-"

"Get in the car, Dib!" Gaz snapped, not wanting to miss a chance to hang with her father. Dib kept up his protest, saying they had to figure out who Derrick was until Gaz pushed him inside before climbing in and shutting the door. "Zim and Tak will probably follow him anyway and tell us what we want. We do have a truce after all." Dib sighed in anger as their father got in the car and drove off.

"Like Zim would tell us anything we want to know." Dib mumbled before looking at his dad. "So dad, why'd you come to our skool? Don't you usually send out a video screen? And what's this test supposed to be anyway?"

"All good questions son." the Professor responded while looking at the rear-view mirror. "The test is to find the brightest children inside the city."

"That's a very small number." Gaz said as she stared at her screen.

"It won't just be inside the city Gazlene. Every student in the entire world will be taking this test. I just wanted to give your skool an early heads up is all." said the Professor. "Tomorrow, I'll be broadcasting live to the entire world that all students should take this test."

"What's it all for?" Dib asked.

"For every reason that I do anything son! For Science! And for the future and betterment of mankind!" the Professor cried out dramatically with his hand raised in the air before placing it back on the steering wheel. "So, how were your days today?" he asked them.

"The new kid in skool went crazy in every class of his today." Dib said.

"Fascinating son," Membrane said before looking at his daughter. "And you Gazlene?"

"Eh, nothing much. Just playing my game." she responded.

"That's nice." said the Professor as he continued to drive on home.

-With Zim and Tak-

Zim and Tak were both waiting near the detention room for Derrick to leave after brainwashing or something to the teacher. They were both waiting inside a janitor's closet and stared at the door to the detention room before Derrick walked out, his sugar rush finally gone, and whistling to himself while heading for the exit to the skool.

"You remember the plan?" Tak whispered.

"Of course. Be quiet, follow, and infiltrate." Zim answered.

"All but infiltrate. We're only seeing where he lives today." Tak argued.

"Why? He'll be too surprised to fight back if we ambush him at his domicile! It will be the perfect opportunity!" Zim snapped.

"We need answers from him! We can't get them if he's dead!" Tak growled before looking at Derrick's retreating back. "We'll discuss this later with the Membranes later. Let's go!" Zim glared at her as she and Zim began to discreetly follow Derrick from the Skool into the city. They kept about a block away from him as they followed, making sure to keep out of sight in case he turned around. They watched as he crossed the street before a truck drove by, blocking their view of him. Their eyes widened when the truck drove by and Derrick disappeared. Tak glared while Zim just stared.

"Hey! He vanished!" Zim stated.

"No shit." Tak muttered sarcastically before walking off. "I'm returning to my base to finish the repairs on Mimi. I'll send her out to scout the city for his home during the weekend. I'll see you at skool on Monday."

"Ha!" Zim yelled. "I will not let his sudden disappearance deter me from finding the answers I seek! I'll find him before you even get your Sir Unit up and running again!" And with that, Zim ran off, leaving Tak to sigh and rub her temples.

'Everything's a competion with that defect.' she thought before walking off.

-Somewhere hidden-

A dark room was being illuminated by a screen, with a feminine figure talking to someone on the other side.

"Do you understand?" said the voice on the screen.

"Don't worry. I won't foul up like Edgar did." said the woman. "I'll personally make sure to stay until they've perished."

"Good." said the voice before cutting out, leaving the woman to her thoughts.

"Soon Derrick," said the woman to herself. "I shall have my revenge on you and your family for destroying my life!"


	13. MARRIAGE?

A/N: Sorry I was gone. Here's the next chapter.

* * *

Zim was in deep thought as he sat inside his base. After losing Derrick, he had retreated home for the day and began pondering what his next move was in figuring out who Derrick is.

"Blasted hyuman!" he snapped as sat at his computer and looked over a few projects he was working on. "Still, to evade me while being observed is impressive. Nevertheless, I will discover his dwelling! And far quicker than Tak, the Dib-Stink, or Little Gaz! HAHAHAHAHAHA!" he cackled before an alarm went off. "Who dares approach the base of ZIM?!"

"It's Gaz Membrane." the computer answered as a screen lowered, showing a live feed of Gaz standing at the door.

"Why would she be here? Another attempt of her brother's to invade my base, no doubt!" Zim declared.

"Or maybe she found Derrick and came to tell you?" the computer guessed. Zim only growled at the computer before walking towards the elevator, sending him up to his kitchen with his disguise on. He walked to the door and opened it find Gaz standing there, her usual scowl on her face.

"Hello, Little G-" he began, only for Gaz to march in, which included knocking Zim over and painfully stepping on him. Zim laid there in pain for a moment before standing up to readjust his wig while scowling at Gaz, who was now sitting on the couch and playing her game. "I did not give you permission to enter!" he growled.

"Wouldn't of mattered." she said as she continued playing, her eyes never leaving the screen. Zim's eye twitched before a high-pitched squeel came from Gir as he ran inside the room, stopping only when he hit a wall. Zim stared at him before looking back at Gaz, who didn't even bother looking at either of them.

"Should I be expecting your brother to arrive?" Zim asked.

"Probably." she replied as Gir stepped back and looked at Gaz.

"Yaaaay! Big boobed scary lady is here!" he yelled in joy.

'Oh great.' Gaz thought as she played. 'Even Zim's stupid robot is looking at my breasts?'

"Since you're here, have you and the Dib-worm found Derrick?" Zim asked.

"No." Gaz answered as she saved her game, turned it off, and put it away. "My father was too busy filling us in about that stupid test everyone's taking Monday."

"Ah yes. Your parental unit was at skool today." Zim remembered. "What was that about?"

"Something very stupid." she growled. "You'll find out Monday."

"Hmm. So you haven't found the Derrick hyuman, nor will you tell me about the test?" Zim asked.

"That's about it." she shrugged.

"Then why did you come here?!" Zim snapped.

"Because I needed to get away from both my brother _and_ dad!" she snapped back, her eyes open and full of anger. Her eyes closed as she looked ahead at the blank T.V. "It's the only place I could think of to get away." she said before grabbing Gir's hand, stopping him from touching her breasts. "Don't touch those." she warned before throwing him into the kitchen and sighing.

"If you are going to stay here, please refrain from damaging Gir and my base." Zim told her. Her only response was a grunt. "I'll take that as a 'yes'." he said before heading back down through the toilet, leaving her alone in the room. She laid down on the couch and stared at the ceiling, her mind going back to the discussion with her father.

-Flashback-

Gaz, Dib, and Prof. Membrane were sitting at the kitchen table, with the Professor holding up a holographic chart of all his contributions to mankind. Dib was hoping for his dad to hurry so he could try and locate Derrick, while Gaz just listened in boredom.

"In conclusion, my contributions to Science are vital to everyone on Earth!" he declared before looking back at his children.

"Okay, but what does that have to do with this strange test you're having everyone take on Monday?" Dib asked after his dad was finished.

"A fine question, son." Prof. Membrane said as he pointed at the greying hairs on his head. "As you can see, I'm not getting any younger. And all experiments to stop the aging process have ended in failure."

"We know." Gaz answered. "We could hear the explosions."

"Since they all failed, I had to face reality. I will one day pass on, leaving this world devoid of many scientific discoveries." Prof. Membrane continued. "And I have a sneaking suspicion that neither of you seem to care for Science." Gaz only shrugged while Dib tried to counter how he was needed to stop aliens and other things. "Yes yes. All those insane things you do. However, I have found a solution to this problem."

"By making kids take tests?" Dib asked.

"This is no ordinary test." Prof. Membrane mused. "It is an I.Q. Test that I have spent months making. It's purpose is to find the most intelligent students, both male and female, out there."

"So, you're looking for nerds?" Gaz asked with one eye partially opened. "For what?"

"Well, I'll only allow the most intelligent to marry either of you." he said. Both of their eyes flew open at those words.

"MARRY?!" Dib yelled in shock.

"Of course!" their father replied as if it was the most simple thing in the world. "And I'll help the children you bear follow the path of Science!" Prof. Membrane declared dramatically, his hand raised in the air. The two children just stared with wide eyes as he put his hand down and walked towards his lab table. "Well, I've got work to do now."

-Present-

Gaz turned to lie on her side as her face adopted a very rare look of sadness. She didn't really like people. To her, everyone was stupid. How they don't have any objection to a brand of soda called 'POOP' was beyond her. And now she had been told that she was to marry some brainy nerd, just so that her father could have it walk in his shoes. Her child...she shuddered at the thought. To have a child would mean sex, and that was the last thing she wanted to think about after being poisoned and nearly raped. She didn't say it out loud, but she had been terrified that day. The thought of that sick pervert ravaging stayed with her after she sent him to the hospital. Even her dreams had been nothing but nightmares of her being his sex slave. She hugged herself with a sigh before she felt someone standing next to her. She turned to see Gir smiling at her.

"What?" she asked in annoyance. He didn't say anything, but he raised his hands towards her again.

-In the base below-

Zim was checking his experiments until her heard something crash down one of the tubes. He turned to see Gir in pieces, his head giggling a lot.

"Scary lady's super squishy!" he cheered.

* * *

A/N: I won't lie. I probably could've done better with this chapter. Just can't seem to get anything good flowing through my brain. Also, I spell 'school' as 'skool' because it's how it was spelled in the series. Those who say I can't spell it right should rewatch the series.


End file.
